My pastor preached on self pity in Sunday School yesterday. He pointed out that in life people will offend us, treat us bad sometimes, things in life will happen. But.... we can't live our whole lives off those moments. Although they do affect us, they don't define us. Okay, so someone said you'd make a terrible mom. Or, you look fat in that dress. Or tells you your mamas fat like a kid told my son a couple of weeks ago. (Argh) As much as I wanted to visit the school and duct tape that boy to the swinging cafeteria doors, I just let it go. It's a little kid. Grownups that act like fighting kids just can't have that kind of power over us. We can't give up our faith because of a few people that hurt us or give up on trying because we don't want to get hurt again. I can't help but hear that same thing over and over "I'll never get over that". Or "Because of this, I'll never trust again. I'm bitter and treat everyone bad around me because I got burned." Etc. I think when we get hurt, it stands out more than the good things because our hearts hurt. But we can't forget how many people in our lives love us and support us. We can't go through life punishing the people we love because someone back in the day hurt us. It's not what God would have for us. Life is a gift and it can't be wasted on those that are jealous of you or just are so miserable that they want to make others miserable also. Misery loves company. I decided that I do have to be careful who I get close to in my life. If it's someone that constantly demands too much from me or doesn't understand that my husband is the leader of my home, or that I have a family that comes first, then maybe it's time to let that go. Or if I have a friend that is a BLAST to hang around but constantly encourages me to do wrong or make compromises in areas I know better, then I have to be careful.
Caleb
Sometimes too I think moms just compare themselves too much to each other. Instead, we live in a huge world and we have to realize that there are soooo many parenting styles out there. What's neat about the movie Babies is that it's about how every culture is different on how they raise their little one. Yet, somehow we all survive. Right? It shows one mommy wiping her babies poopy butt on her leg to clean him. Well, we use baby wipes here but, heh, everyone is different. If that works for her then, well, so be it.
Ivy
I haven't actually seen this movie but I love the concept of it. Babies and mommies across the Globe. One time I was passing the nursery and overheard mommies debating over who cleans the most in one day. One mommy said she mops 3 times a day another said she mops 4. Goodness. I'm just happy to mop when I get a chance. Like once a week Okay, so for some, they find comfort and happiness maybe in spending so much time each day cleaning. I've known some to even think of it as a hobby. For me, babies and blogging are my hobby. I love, love, love playing with my kids each day and dread the day they move out and on with their lives. I love playing hide and seek all the time, sitting and talking with them while cuddling. I cherish each of those moments with them and it makes it to where cleaning is mostly done when they are passed out sleeping in their bed. I just hate cleaning while they are awake. Probably the only time I'll ever see cleaning as a hobby is when there are NO kids here and I have nothing else to do. Perhaps by then I'll be living my dream and working at an Orphanage. (I've already scoped one out). I've wanted to work at one since I was a teenager. I just don't know if cleaning will EVER be a hobby for me. But mommy and wifey are my dream hobbies and I'm living it. :P
Pssst! Don't forget to enter for some really cute Sparkle Farms Bloomer Shorts for your little girl! Odds of winning are super awesome.
Well, you know cleaning is definitely not a hobby for me! Ha ha. I LOVED the babies movie for that same reason. If you wanted to see my full review here is the link http://www.messymom.com/2010/08/i-love-babies.html
Sounds like you had a very encouraging Sunday service. It's like the saying "hurt people, hurt people". We can't live in bitterness if we want to make a difference.
Babies is amazing. I totally loved it. We took my son to it when he was just two and a half and it was in the theaters. He'd never been to a movie before, and was totally transfixed and kept talking to the babies. It was very cute, and got a lot of laughs from the other movie-goers.
So true! And mopping once a week - well, that's my goal. It doesn't always happen.
"Babies" was neat. I think I most associated wit the parents in Mongolia - not insane like the geeky American couple they picked, but also not sitting in the dust naked like the baby in Africa (forget what country). It reminded me a lot of how I was raised in rural Hungary.
And that kid who told your son that is full of it!!! You are not even remotely close to having any extra weight on you! He was just jealous because he doesn't have a mom as pretty as your kids do!
I saw babies! It was really well done and I for one actually enjoyed the feel of being in the background watching rather then it being of a more interative interview type documentary. If you find the time you should definately check it out.
Thank you, Zsuzsanna! I still always worry about my weight. It's crazy. I think about it constantly and drive myself nuts. I was a gym nut even when I was a teen. I didn't need to lose weight but I just loved working out. WeIrD!
Chris, I'm surprised you haven't seen it there! Hmmm... can you get on DVD? I've seen some clips on it and it's amazing learning about the different cultures.
I've been wanting to see that documentary!...you're right...its a big big world out there...our way or that other persons way is jsut a teeny teeny little portion of this great big world and the many (and good!) types of people in it!
For some of us a perfect family and perfect kids was a goal but then reality set in when they became teenagers. Some of us have no extended family to help out whatsoever. Jesus works for those that havent been treated like garbage in the church. Seeing your teens make horrible decisions and disobeying again and again is truly heart breaking. If you havent been through this, please dont judge those of us who have for our "bitter attitudes" and letting the past haunt us. Dont judge me for a lack of faith and a bad attitude until your teen cuts and mutilates themselve repeatedly and attempts suicide everytime she is depressed and turns to guys sexually for attention. I'm sorry if this isnt nice and pretty to read. But some of us have a hard time having a good Godly attitude because of these things that God wont fix and allows to happen. But if anyone here would take the time to read the old testament, you would see that God is a very judgemental, violent, and wrathful God who orders the killings of hundreds of thousands, maybe millions. So maybe God isnt so nice and loving after all!!
As a teen who used to cut herself and had good parents that truly loved me, trust me when I say, this too shall pass. Just be there for her. She is making life ultra hard on herself, yes, but be there in her times of grief. Hold and tell her she's beautiful, smart, funny, enjoyable, sweet, and that you wouldn't pick any other person to replace her in the whole world. Trust me when I say this. This is what I desperately needed. Because she has opened herself up to major hearbreaks with guys, of course these emotions will be deep. Because the scars will be deep. As her dad, just be there for her. You'll be the guy that doesn't walk away after they get what they want. I can't fix your opinions of God. Or how your heart hurts because of mistrust from people in the past. But those people that caused God's children to stumble, will answer to Him. I went through years of hurt, not because of my parents, but because of other issues. I just needed my dad and mom to be there not only when my heart was broken, but to find the time to be there when I put up my fronts. Sometimes my dad left me notes of encouragement or love. Sent flowers to me just because. Do whatever it takes, Peter, to show her that she doesn't need sexual attention to bring her happiness. She'll feel she is wanted by her dad and loved for who she is. Even if she blows you off, trust me that she does crave this attention.
10 comments:
Well, you know cleaning is definitely not a hobby for me! Ha ha. I LOVED the babies movie for that same reason. If you wanted to see my full review here is the link
http://www.messymom.com/2010/08/i-love-babies.html
Sounds like you had a very encouraging Sunday service. It's like the saying "hurt people, hurt people". We can't live in bitterness if we want to make a difference.
Babies is amazing. I totally loved it. We took my son to it when he was just two and a half and it was in the theaters. He'd never been to a movie before, and was totally transfixed and kept talking to the babies. It was very cute, and got a lot of laughs from the other movie-goers.
So true! And mopping once a week - well, that's my goal. It doesn't always happen.
"Babies" was neat. I think I most associated wit the parents in Mongolia - not insane like the geeky American couple they picked, but also not sitting in the dust naked like the baby in Africa (forget what country). It reminded me a lot of how I was raised in rural Hungary.
And that kid who told your son that is full of it!!! You are not even remotely close to having any extra weight on you! He was just jealous because he doesn't have a mom as pretty as your kids do!
I saw babies! It was really well done and I for one actually enjoyed the feel of being in the background watching rather then it being of a more interative interview type documentary. If you find the time you should definately check it out.
Oh I would love to see that movie, wonder if it is coming down here!
Thank you, Zsuzsanna! I still always worry about my weight. It's crazy. I think about it constantly and drive myself nuts. I was a gym nut even when I was a teen. I didn't need to lose weight but I just loved working out. WeIrD!
Chris, I'm surprised you haven't seen it there! Hmmm... can you get on DVD? I've seen some clips on it and it's amazing learning about the different cultures.
I've been wanting to see that documentary!...you're right...its a big big world out there...our way or that other persons way is jsut a teeny teeny little portion of this great big world and the many (and good!) types of people in it!
Babies is definitely worth watching. Those cute little faces alone makes it a must see.
Talk about not needing a marketing strategy, right? The movie couldn't fail, being about the one thing that we are all hard-wired to love! :-)
For some of us a perfect family and perfect kids was a goal but then reality set in when they became teenagers. Some of us have no extended family to help out whatsoever. Jesus works for those that havent been treated like garbage in the church. Seeing your teens make horrible decisions and disobeying again and again is truly heart breaking. If you havent been through this, please dont judge those of us who have for our "bitter attitudes" and letting the past haunt us. Dont judge me for a lack of faith and a bad attitude until your teen cuts and mutilates themselve repeatedly and attempts suicide everytime she is depressed and turns to guys sexually for attention. I'm sorry if this isnt nice and pretty to read. But some of us have a hard time having a good Godly attitude because of these things that God wont fix and allows to happen. But if anyone here would take the time to read the old testament, you would see that God is a very judgemental, violent, and wrathful God who orders the killings of hundreds of thousands, maybe millions. So maybe God isnt so nice and loving after all!!
Hi Peter. :)
As a teen who used to cut herself and had good parents that truly loved me, trust me when I say, this too shall pass. Just be there for her. She is making life ultra hard on herself, yes, but be there in her times of grief. Hold and tell her she's beautiful, smart, funny, enjoyable, sweet, and that you wouldn't pick any other person to replace her in the whole world. Trust me when I say this. This is what I desperately needed. Because she has opened herself up to major hearbreaks with guys, of course these emotions will be deep. Because the scars will be deep. As her dad, just be there for her. You'll be the guy that doesn't walk away after they get what they want. I can't fix your opinions of God. Or how your heart hurts because of mistrust from people in the past. But those people that caused God's children to stumble, will answer to Him. I went through years of hurt, not because of my parents, but because of other issues. I just needed my dad and mom to be there not only when my heart was broken, but to find the time to be there when I put up my fronts. Sometimes my dad left me notes of encouragement or love. Sent flowers to me just because. Do whatever it takes, Peter, to show her that she doesn't need sexual attention to bring her happiness. She'll feel she is wanted by her dad and loved for who she is. Even if she blows you off, trust me that she does crave this attention.
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