|Ryan was a blind referee|
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
Monday, October 12, 2015
Please pray that we can successfully get our foster care license. I don't know if it'll be easier because we already have a foster placement in our home and already went through background checks and home inspection. All that was passed. I guess I'll see because this is all new to me. I'm going to try and take the crash course in order for the process to go faster getting my license. :)
Friday, October 02, 2015
|Kyle's 12th birthday|
Next time a parent asks me if I think my kids need more socialization, I'll just say, "No thanks. Not that kind of socialization."
Sunday, September 13, 2015
Ryan tested into 9th grade rather than into 8th so him and Chaz will be starting high school together. I got them into a school district but they do their work at home. They have their own teacher so it takes the load off of me a bit. I asked them if they wanted to attend a high school together. The only catch is I would not allow them to go to a regular 4 year high school but one that goes down all the way to Kindergarten. It's a charter school and they'd be with their siblings. They both said no, they'd rather stay home. So it is what it is. :) Four kids at home and four kids in a charter school. The only one that does not want to be there is Kyle. He got bullied on his first day and every day since. Thankfully, they're completely against bullying and once he brought it to their attention they caught the boy and got him to stop. Hopefully he's done bullying my son for good. We'll see. Many times I've always believed that bullying is learned behavior. The sad thing is I'm hoping it's not because the bully is being bullied at home or anywhere else. :( Maybe Kyle and I should pray together for him. He said the kids in the class are extremely disrespectful and swear all the time. Just because he doesn't do those things, it's made Kyle more noticeable. Now they're coming after Kyle because he's different. I told Kyle to stand strong. It's a GREAT thing to be different and it's even more awesome that it's because he's respectful and does his work! :D
Sunday, August 30, 2015
I already have my whole week planned! I have to schedule appointments for the heart doctor and skin doctor for myself. My doctor was a bit concerned. My son Chaz has to have a blood test to make sure he's okay. Jaxon might be getting a helmet for his head in two months. He'll wear it till he's 18 months old. So basically for a year. Juliet, like I said, needs potty training and some focus on her behavior. Right now she's got so many siblings catering to her. Argh. That's the problem when you have a naughty 3 year old that is just so cute they get away with things. I have some major projects I need to do in the house, like turning my garage into a playroom. It's gonna be a huge job. I have huuuuge plans for this school year and need the extra time.
My life just has exploded with busyness and I need to get a grip on it. I'm absolutely in love with my family. Wow, as hard as I work for my husband and eight kids, I wouldn't trade them for anything!! Just need a change in the routine. I even have their new curriculum sitting on top of the armoir right now but I sending it back on Tuesday. I'm hoping I have lots more time for blogging as well. My kids actually went to bed early in anticipation for school tomorrow. We'll see how long that lasts. Haha.
Anyhow, I have to include an amazing video of my kids and their friends at camp with our church this past summer. Amazing! It is neat seeing them in the video. I absolutely with all my heart love the people at my church. Wow... :D
Sunday, June 21, 2015
I NEED HELP TODAY AND THE NEXT FEW DAYS TO ACT LIKE A CHRISTIAN.
Lord, help me to pray for them and not just be angry. Being angry of the constant pain moms like these cause doesn't help anything. Prayer does.
I will pray...
"Jesus, I pray for this awesome, beautiful, amazing family. I pray you will protect them and keep them safe from anyone that would try to hurt them by coming in between them with a purpose to separate. I pray you'll protect their hearts and give them joy and peace. I pray against any curses spoken against their marriage. You created marriage, I know you can began to work a healing. Please hold this marriage safely in your hands. Amen."
Thursday, June 18, 2015
As a mom, how do I be okay with watching my little ones just grow up and move away. I sit here at 1am, looking at photos of acquaintances and their kids, realizing that I only blinked and they're grown. Why does time have to go so fast? Why? Can't we hold onto time just a little longer? In 2 months I'll have a 14 and 15 year old. Did I do enough? Did I show them the love of Christ through me? Do they really know I'd give my life for them if I had to? Not just in serving my family but in every way. How do I let go? Now I understand that look on my mom's face the day I moved out of her house into my little apartment. Her baby was leaving...
|Chaz (6) at school|
|A bored Chaz (14) sitting through a lecture at a school|
|Kyle (3), Ryan (5), Chaz (6) being silly|
|Ryan (13) saying hi through our cameras while daddy was away on business trip|
Monday, June 15, 2015
"You will keep in perfect peace ALL who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on you." Isaiah 26:3-4
"The Lord gives His people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace." Psalms 29:11
No, it's not a sign of true Christianity when you're constantly tormented or vice versa. It's okay that Christians go through trials and it will happen. However, it's also very possible for God to give peace even through these trials. Me having peace doesn't mean I'm unsaved.
Yesterday in service I was watching my son in the front raising his hands in worship, next to his best friend who was also lifting his hands in praise. I was in awe. So in awe of the changes I have seen in these boys. Seeing my other son serve in sound ministry and with a joyful heart. Wow! At their age, I was more worried about when service was going to be over and what we were going to have for lunch. It's almost been 2 years since we attended our new church and the investment they have put into my kids has dramatically made a difference. That's not how I was at 13 and 14. Sometimes I have to shake my head to see if I'm dreaming. Did God really take me out of deep depression and give me this new life just a year and 9 months ago? How did I deserve this? Even when I was shaking my fist at God and asking why. More like shouting. He never left me. Even through the heartache and abandonment by my friends, I shouted and I cried, but He never left me. He was always there. I didn't know because I put man's opinion and rules above His. He never meant for His people to carry such a heavy burden of works.
"For My yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." Matthew 11:30
Yet, as much as I felt burdened by other people's heavy standards, I have no hatred, no bitterness, but a sadness. I've been there. I've carried the burden of works and had no peace. I had none because every night I would question whether or not I did enough to make God pleased with me. I constantly testified about what God was doing in my life and how He's given me joy and peace. Every bit of it was a lie. I knew what to say but never truly felt what I claimed. I felt like a liar every time I said it.
When I realized a whole section of the bible, tons and tons of scriptures that I once had been blind to, was about how we can't earn our way into heaven. Not before OR AFTER salvation, I felt like that guy in the movie "Pilgrims Progress". The part where he's standing at the cross and the humongous burden on his back falls off and rolls away. I thought that part was just for sinners. No, it was for me. That heavy burden was of works. Does my back still sometimes feel sore from carrying that burden for 34 years? Yes, it does. But when I remember His promises, that we are saved by grace, not by works, I straighten my back and keep on going. I can never, ever, ever let anyone take His gift of peace from me. He doesn't give a select church group peace. He gives ALL his people peace.
"God saved you by His grace when you believed. And you can't take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it." Ephesians 2:8-9
"So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to Him, the power of the life giving spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death. The law of Moses was unable to save us because of the weakness of our sinful nature. So God did what the law could not do. He sent his own son in a body like the bodies we sinners have. And in that body God declared an end to sin's control over us by giving his Son as a sacrifice for our sins. He did this so that the just requirement of the law would be FULLY satisfied for us, who no longer follow our sinful nature but instead follow the spirit." Romans 8:1-4
"You foolish Galatians, who has bewitched you, before who eyes Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified? This is the only thing I want to find out from you: did you receive the Spirit by the works of the Law, or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having BEGUN by the spirit, are you now being PERFECTED BY THE FLESH? Did you suffer so many things in vain, if indeed it was in vain? So then, does He who provides you with the Spirit and works miracles among you, do it by the works of the law or by hearing with faith? Even so Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness." Galatians 3: 1-6
Thank you for Your peace, Jesus.
Tuesday, June 09, 2015
Okay, sometimes there are days where Juliet puts me in complete survival mode. I feel as if I'm literally just surviving the day. It's gotten that hard. It's like she took the confidence I had in how I raised all the other kids and shred it to pieces. Yet, she can be incredibly cute. Do you know what that means? It means she wars with our heart. Haha. One moment you want to scream and the next moment you want to cuddle her. I would cuddle her AND scream but that might look scary. I've tried gates yet she figured them out. I have one gate left she can't figure out that keeps her in the big living room area. She has closely been watching people open and shut it. She's currently working on it. I keep lots of toys and fun stuff in there yet she's not happy with only having a living room to rule. Have mercy!!!!
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
|Cuddling Jaxon after he had his circumcision|
|Jaxon (2 1/2 weeks old)|
|Juliet (turning 3 this week) and daddy|
Thank you, Jesus, for each little phase of childhood. Each one is truly a blessing as it changes and challenges us in different ways.
Monday, May 04, 2015
Anyway, what is wrong with me? I don't blog as often. I know I'm a mom of eight (whoa) but still.... I love to blog! I still don't feel like I have 8 kids. When I'm around them it feels like a small group of kids. I JUST had Jaxon and my oldest son is asking me to have more. He's worried I'll run out of time and get too old. Funny! I'm only ummm.... (seriously can't remember how old I am. Hold on.) I'm only gonna be 36 this June! Okay, if I was gonna be 37 in June I would have freaked. Phew. WOW, I really am running out of time.... Sigh. Why does time have to go so fast? Why do we have to age so fast? There is sooooo much living to do but the childbearing years are so short. :( Thank you, God, for my 8 babies and the one You have in Heaven. Thank you for alllllll your blessings.
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
I can't believe my youngest two kids will be 3 years apart! Now I'll know what it's like to have kids 1, 2, and 3 years apart. I had my first three kids within 3 years. They are now all best buddies. IT still worked out with my kids that are 2 years apart. What will it be like with a 3 year gap? This should be interesting and Juliet SHOULD be potty trained. Everything has to be her idea. She really wanted panties and potty training toilet. She was soooo happy when I presented it to her till a couple days later when I suggested she try to potty on it. The look on her face when she realized this was something that wasn't her idea anymore. So now she pulls up panties over her diaper and tries to act big walking around in them. Cheater pants!!! I've been changing diapers for so many years I've learned when they are ready they are ready. I think when Jaxon gets here, I'll focus on it a bit more. Right now I have my ONE baby in diapers and it makes me happy. :D
Today we got locked out of our house and had to break the chain lock to get in. Two of our kids had their leadership class, chain locked the front door, then ran out through the garage while it was closing. Well, we don't use our garage for the van so didn't have the opener with us. So now I'm in panic that Juliet is going to escape midday right out the front door. EVEN though we have it locked with a child proof handle. I'd better replace that chain lock asap. No joke. Houdini's copy cat lives here.
Sunday, April 12, 2015
I didn't want my last weeks with Jaxon to be a nightmare. I look forward to every day but I embrace each day. I've learned to enjoy living in the moment rather than thinking fun is around the next corner. I felt serious guilt wanting Jaxon to come out and I felt robbed of my last pleasant weeks with him in my womb. This is been such an amazingly, joyful pregnancy. When a mom is that sick, taking care of kids is extremely difficult. Charles ended up taking off work to care for them. I'm so excited to have my life back, my babies back and I don't complain anymore about how many times I have to potty being pregnant. Not being able to potty for 2 days at a time was extremely scary. Not to mention being only able to eat one meal a day.
Here's to an amazing 12 days before Jaxon is here! I may lose sleep again once he comes but at least it'll be for a sweet, little one. Not some dumb sickness. :D
Sunday, April 05, 2015
So I was talking with my family about a good day to be born on. I told them as long as it's not on a prime number day or an odd number. My exception would be the 25th as far as being an odd number (clearly not a prime number). Did I ever tell you I have a thing with numbers? I don't want to end up with an odd number of kids. This complicates things for me because I think eight kids is a great and fun amount. However, I don't feel done. So, if I have another one, I'm just gonna have to make it 10 so we don't land on nine! Who knows though because no matter what, God is in control. At least 9 is not a prime number. Ha! (Such a nerd). By the way, 16 is my favorite number. :D No, I'm not gonna have 16 kids! Ha ha!
|With one of my favorite guys that help sick kids. Ronald McDonald!|
|Macaroni for 60! Eek!|
Anyway, my back is burning sitting down to type this. Hi to all my blogger friends!!!
Friday, March 27, 2015
The first day we go there we wanted to check out the Santa Monica Beach. That is definitely a fun beach if you are okay with the crowds. It wasn't too bad being it was such a popular beach. Maybe the summer would be worse? On the pier there are so many options of fun. You pick from tons of restaurants, my husband's fave was Bubba Gump Shrimp. There are rides. Being that the next day we were gonna hit up Knott's Berry Farm, we decided to just go on the ferris wheel and check out the sun setting on the ocean. Was gorgeous!!! That is definitely a very FUN beach!
|Kyle and Ryan|
Our third day we went to Seal Beach. It was so neat seeing the military ships way off in the distance. That's partly why I wanted to go. I think every time we go to a beach, we like to try a different one. This was new! The kids were able to see seals, starfish, and other fun sea stuff. The day was warm and this time we weren't freezing with sweaters! I was so worried we'd get a foggy or rainy day. It's hard to plan in advance because you never know how the weather is gonna be. It was great! It was an amazing day and we didn't plan anything else as we just wanted it to be all about our time together at the beach. Sigh. It was great!!!
|Ryan (13) holding dead stingray|
Monday, March 09, 2015
It would be nice if I could be super confident in our choices. All I can do is look at my own experiences growing up in the public school system. I absolutely loved school before 4th grade. Kindergarten was amazing as it was mostly learning through play. We had naptimes, a dollhouse, legos, books, toys, reading time. It was fun and a great introduction to learning. Only when we hit 1st grade then it got serious about reading and numbers. What I learned in 1st grade, kids are now learning day one of Kindergarten. There is no easy transition. I will never forget the shock on my firstborn's face as I led him into his kindergarten classroom. Blank, white walls and not a toy to be seen. He looked out of place and ready to bolt. He HATED his first day and I didn't blame him.
4th grade was a disaster for me as that's when the bullying started. There was so much peer pressure to be cool and if you cared too much about learning and getting ahead then you were a nerd. If you didn't have the most expensive clothes then you were shunned and out of their circles. Each grade on up got increasingly worse but one thing I really noticed was the older I got, the less the lessons made any real life sense. High school was getting ridiculous to me. Whatever happened to learning what we actually needed in life? Every single time I ask a public school kid fresh into the summer break what they learned in History that year, they shrug their shoulders and say, "I don't know. I can't remember."
A friend pointed out a really neat video going viral. If you have a hard time understanding the words in the song he has them written out under the info of the song.
Monday, March 02, 2015
Another reason I hadn't been blogging was because I had an extra family living with me and I had zero time. There is no exaggeration there. I would run nonstop from wake up till I fell in my bed. I've been able to get my kids on a schedule since 2009 so it's not as hard. They knew what to expect from day to day. It's a whole different story taking in kids that aren't used to it. I wasn't able to train my kids overnight so it wasn't easy to try to get it going with the new kids. I felt like I was finally gaining some ground after they had been here for 4 months but by then they were gone.
You know how each mom is different? There is a saying, "There is no perfect way to parent but a million ways to be a really good one." I've finally learned a couple years ago that moms have to stop pushing their way onto each other. Respect each other for our differences. My friend and I wildly, wildly parented our kids differently. Down to how we discipline our kids, bedtimes, habits, eating, cleaning, homeschool, etc. Does it make her bad or me bad? No. It just means we had different ideas on how to raise our kids. But being that we have our own habits and routines, it made the differences in the home tiring at times for her and I. Often at night, I would just collapse in my bed completely exhausted.
I don't care how good of friends I am with anyone, living with someone is not easy. Add kids to the mix and it's not easy. Two moms in the house? Just ask some polygamists. They often have to work through the same issues. Daily. I only had to do it for four months. By the time she moved out she was relieved and her kids were relieved. We were relieved and my kids were. I slept well for the first time in months. It's just hard like that. My house was quiet and stayed much, much cleaner. She doesn't have to deal with Juliet and her getting into everything. So we both appreciate things we otherwise might have taken for granted! I greatly took for granted how hard I have worked on my kids on their routines and homeschool. Having our days go back to what it was four months ago makes me really proud of all the years of hard work and training. I've just been so encouraged by the entire experience.
Sometimes when we allow God to do a work through us, even if it's hard, in the end it was a huge lesson to be learned. If we're not careful of our attitudes in the process and after, we'll lose the lesson that was meant to teach us and bless us. Especially where there can be growth in our own hearts!!! I had a terrible time with hospitality. I've lost a ton of friends (maybe not real friends?) by switching churches. That hurt and because of it I grew very withdrawn. I wanted to just be with my family and not reach out anymore. A week before this family moved in I asked God to help me with hospitality. Coincidence? I don't know. Maybe. But I took it. Was it for money? No. They paid rent but we still went in the negative from the extra supplies used, water, electricity, etc. You know why I didn't mind? Because it wasn't about the money. I knew it was a work on my heart and I badly needed it. It's almost as if my heart went into a major surgery that was badly needed. It pushed me to my limits and taught me patience I thought I already had. I'm sure it did the same for my roommates! The fact that a friendship can survive through such differences and never getting a break from each other is a wow factor for sure. :D
Maybe in the future I should stop running from tests just because I'm afraid it'll be hard work. I'm glad I didn't run from this one. It was hard but worth the journey.
Don't just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.
Monday, January 26, 2015
I want to be free from people who can't realize we're in America and can choose not only our religion but how to raise our kids. No matter if you agree with small families or very large families, both can come with abuse or neglect. I know people that only have 2 children but they are so busy with their careers they ignore their kids. I know other people that have only 2 or 3 kids but ignore their kids to watch TV for hours and hours a day. That's pretty much a widespread problem. I have 7 kids and I spend way more individual time with each one. When you barely watch TV, homeschool your kids, and you put your family as priority above any other ministry, it's easy to spend individual time with each one. My kids fight over who gets to be the next buddy when I'm pregnant. When I found out this one was a boy, my little daughter cried because that meant her brother was the next buddy instead. We plan vacations twice a year as a whole family and each of my kids go on individual daddy/kid or mommy/kid dates. So neglect can come in families of all sizes. I have kids of small families that tell me they so wish they could be in our family because it's obvious my kids are so happy and blessed. It's just perspective and opinions. To each their own. Life is way more fun if you focus on the positive and how to help your own personal family than bash families you only know from books or TV.
Michelle Duggar gets mocked for always smiling and is accused of being fake, but I understand that smile. I rarely yell, I try to always keep my cool, and usually no matter how I feel I try to maintain a positive attitude around my husband, kids, friends, etc. People say I always smile. I am not a robot but I am careful of my attitudes. When you know Jesus and have a close relationship with him, the joy He gives! I have a peace and joy now like never before. Some might see that kind of smile and call it fake, it's not. It's just there is a difference between happiness and joy. Happiness is circumstantial. Joy is unconditional. Of course there are times for sadness and grief, but in general, someone that has peace in their heart, they are often accused of being fake.
I grew up with no TV, only Christian radio, standards on modesty, no theaters, and no getting close to boys even as friends, no school dances, no prom and I always had watchful eyes on me. Did I feel abused? No. I actually have very, very good memories. My family was just as strict as the Duggars and I had an awesome upbringing! My parents chose the lifestyle and you know what I did? I respected them and now I thank them because while I had friends growing up watching TV shows where teens are talking back to their parents or kissing boys underage, I was protected from all that. Half my friends were pregnant by 16 while I was very much enjoying my childhood safe and sound. The only time I ever got in serious trouble was when I veered off onto my own destructive paths that they warned me from. Don't assume that kids kept wholesome in their minds and hearts are being left out. I THANK my parents often, no joke, for protecting me from what I saw my friends go through.
Grow up! It's America! Different families, religions, lifestyles. If you don't understand someone else's happiness, don't bash them, be happy for them rather than assume they must be freaks.
Friday, January 16, 2015
|Jumping with brother's underwear on her head|
|Taking off her clothes at auto body shop|
|Showing me how she got into my makeup|
|moving large sign across waiting room|
|Showing us her clothes selection|