Working Slowly to Becoming a Minimalist

I have cleared out so much stuff in my house but I'm working towards becoming a minimalist.  My sister already has it down pat but it's still rocket science for me.  I have been trying and trying to work on it for months.  I still have much clutter in closets and cupboards.  Sigh.  However, if we all work as a team we can get the house cleaned up super fast.  It used to be that it would take much, much longer because of all the clutter.  Have you ever seen any of the shows about gypsy lives? The only reason why I love it is I'm watching how they function with so little stuff and they have large families. Cleaning is so, so, so simple.  However, I can't seem to find a website that actually give a how to, like a guide.  I don't like talking about it.  Just give me the steps.  If anyone wants to enlighten me, I would love to find a website!  :D

Because of Juliet mainly, our walls in the house look horrid.  It's time for us to paint again.  I am terrible about picking out paint because I always do the wrong color.  In fact, I need to just call my sister and ask her.  She's like the beautiful version of Martha Stewart but without the jail time.  We also need a good cleaning of all the carpets.  We need a new couch, a new bed for Charles and I, and now a new 12 passenger van.  It died.  So, yay for us!  :D  Yeah, lots of work needed around here.


Side note:
Oh, my heart hurts.  I would be due soon with baby Genesis if I hadn't miscarried.  I still cry at least every other week.  I can't go near where I buried the baby because I'll bawl.  I have flowers and it's gated off from everything so no one can trample the area.  My baby.  Today I have a 10 week scan to make sure this baby in my stomach is growing properly.  I'm very nervous.

Why Can't I Be Like Everyone Else- Mommy Insecurities

I need to step up on my game.  Sometimes I feel so insecure because I can't get the house perfect like I see in all those Instagram and Facebook photos.  I don't get it?  Ha.  I was the baby of the family.  Babies are known to be the messies.  Whyyyyy can't I retrain myself to be like this fantastical, amazing, pefecto woman, wife, mom, everything?  My husband said, "All those women you compare yourself to, are they homeschooling a large family?  Because it's just not the same otherwise and it's not fair to compare yourself to someone where their life is just completely different."  I love my husband.  It always puts it back into perspective for me.  :)

Not sure how clutter gets back into my house but it does.  We are not shopaholics here but it just makes sense that which 9 people, stuff can just add up quick with birthday and holidays.  It's like this never ending carousel for me that I've learned to just deal with rather than loathe.  Some people can just stay right on top of it.  I'm amazed by them.... unless something or someone(s) important in their life is being replaced to do it.  I want my kids to grow up and really feel they know me.  I hope they'll say we had a relationship.  I promise, the clean house doesn't matter because that's such a faded part in my memory of my own past.  I remember the relationship stuff.

Juliet has got to be the world's lightest sleeping baby.  She will go to bed on time but because she hears people going to the bathroom in the middle of the night, she'll wake up.  She never puts herself back to sleep but instead calls for us to come play with her.  I have to keep certain pajamas on her and keep a gate up at her door or she'll run naked throughout the house in the middle of the night.  She doesn't just strip and run, she laughs wildly while she does it.   Ha ha.  So cute but soooooo much work. 

Usually the softie to come to her side is Ivy.  Ivy will hug her, change her diaper, get her a bottle, and they'll snuggle.  However, Ivy got trapped into playing in her castle with her at 1am.  Anytime Ivy tried to walk out Juliet would cry.  In fact, when I took this picture, that's exactly why Juliet was crying in it.  Ivy felt bad, came back in, and when she did, Juliet pushed-forced her towards the castle. Ivy and Juliet are giggling their heads off right now. 

Don't You Feel Seven Kids is Enough?

I'm in such a weird stage of my life.  I never thought about it coming.  EVER.  I'm 35 and I've been blessed with 7 beautiful, fun, amazing, challenging, heart wrenching, adventurous kids.  One is in heaven, although it's heartbreaking, I'm excited to meet someday.  ;) 

Last week I dismantled the crib for the first time in 14 years.  Not super excited about it.  Why am I feeling that way?  Aren't some parents happy to get out of those diaper and crib stages?  Doesn't it mean less physical slavery work but more drama? (Older kids come with more drama.)  Ha.  I wasn't happy about putting the crib in the garage.  I was sad. I love the little pitter-patter of the feet across the house.  I love the kisses and babbling.  I don't care about all the diaper changes.  I've never had a break so far for 14 years and that's just fine with me.  

On the other side of it, no more babies means less work, less sleepless nights, no strollers, no diapers, no crib, no packing a diaper bag, no nursing, no binkies, no bottles.....

I don't know...... I'm extremely content.  The weirdest thing is before I got pregnant with baby Genesis that we lost, I constantly was setting out 10 dinner plates.  We'd be sitting at the table and I'd look around to see who was missing.  It would dawn on me that we are only a family of nine.  I'm talking about for months I did this.  Once I got pregnant and lost the baby, I've never accidentally done this again. Weird, huh?  My heart hurts thinking about never, ever having a little baby in my tummy again.  Never again experiencing the miracle of birth. I don't mind waking up to those newborn cries a zillion times a night.  I'm so used to it now.  And believe me, it's not baby fever.  I have person fever.  Every single kid I have is so uniquely different that I just love learning about each one of them and I love their differences!  It's so fun to see all the different personalities.
 

 

I'm sure lots of people go through these feelings.  I just don't personally know anyone.  If I express these feelings to people in my life they'd most likely say, "Well, don't you feel seven is enough?"  When did it ever become a number?  They are not a group to me.  I know each and every kid personally.  I make it a point to spend personal time with each one.  And boy, I enjoy it!  Yes, it's sooooo much work.  Yes, housekeeping is a battle for me because it's getting messy as we're cleaning.  Okay, so what?  Who said a perfect house even matters?  Good grief.  I love toys strewn across my house.  It shows we love living.  A perfect house just feels unlived in and kind of empty.  Besides, I have no friends that are perfectionists.  I find that personality a bit annoying.  (Sorry if I offended anyone).   I'm not saying I like it messy but to me there is a balance.  If you randomly show up at my house, it's gonna look lived in. 

When is it time to move forward?  I thought by now it'd be so obvious to me.  People have told me many, many times that you'll always just know when you are done.  Well, good grief, I'm still waiting for that definite feeling.

Decisions on How to Spend 2 1/2 Hours of Quiet Time/Bliss for Any Mom

Tonight I had nursery at church with the babies, toddlers, and 4's and 5's.  Being that I have so many the same age, I always think about what life might be like for people that have like quintuplets or septuplets.  Haha.  I think, "Man, their days would be sooooo busy!"  Haha.  Then I go home to my nice quiet house of seven kids.  Seriously, it IS DIFFERENT.  I have kids from the ages of one to 13 so, yeah, it is different.  One or two in diapers at a time.  Not all at once.  I wish I could take pictures of all the cute little kids in nursery but I definitely have my favorites.  A little redhead boy that's a live wire is definitely one of my faves.  He's like a ball of energy.  Kind of like a super hero with coffee in his system.  Just a dash of mischievousness.  Love him!  My little Juliet is the known escapee of the group.  We have to have the door shut AND a baby gate put up for when she gets past the door.  You thought we had chain locks on all our doors at home to keep the boogie man out huh?  Nope, it's to keep the little curly blond in the house.

I added something into our day that really kind stretches me to my limit.  I seriously don't think I can mentally afford to do any more than what I'm doing right now.  When I say mentally afford I mean, if mommy can't teach and raise kids with joy, then whatever it is that is making mommy a grouch butt has to go.  Whether it's an outside activity or a time consuming person not part of the immediate family.  I don't know whether to rejoice or wince at times.  (It's kinda half and half depending on the day).  There is a church almost next door to us that does a fun after school program, complete with learning and bible study.  Well, that's double dose for my kids because we already hold our own bible studies at home every morning.  I just thought it'd be neat for my kids to meet other kids in the neighborhood.  Plus, they have the opportunity for volunteer work and gardening.  Once a week they are teaching them baseball and another day basketball. They are having so much fun.  However, we have to really be on the ball to get bible study, homeschool, and chores done before 3:30pm when they leave.  Four kids choose to go which means I usually have only one teen and two little ones napping during that time.  For 2 1/2 hours I can either choose to sit and sip coffee with a good book, mop the floor, or just work on dinner or chores.  I mean, seriously... 2 1/2 hours of options!  Haha.  Yes!  However, it's made my day tighter for the other waking hours and I have to stay on top of things big time.

Back On My Feet

I know it's been awhile since I've posted.  I took a week off from homeschooling.  The first couple of days (after the weekend I miscarried) I pretty much just stayed in bed, cried, was in pain, and not much else.  After those four days I couldn't handle laying down anymore.  I got up and decided to spend the rest of the days off just getting my house together.  My house got TORN APART while I was in bed.  It was bad.  The kids had fun never picking up after themselves and not having mommy remind them to.  I worked so much scrubbing everything my arm had spasms and I couldn't sleep from the pain.  Nobody believes me how bad the house can get when I'm down and out but it can.  Believe me.  Kids that don't go to school mean they are all home and living, playing, and it can add up fast.

I cleaned like I crazy lady.  It was like therapy for me.  I'm no perfectionist.  Ha to that!  But it was keeping myself busy rather than laying around and being sad.  It worked.  I got my house 75% organized in just a few days.  I thought to my self, "my gosh, it's easy to clean when mom doesn't have to homeschool. If my kids were in school I'd have all that time to clean."  I'm not gonna do that though but the thought did cross my mind.  Oh well.  ;) I love having them with me every day!  They may be a lot of work, but I love my job 100% and wouldn't trade it to have them gone just so I can have the perfect thouse.

The other night I had my parents over, actually my mom cooked for us, and it was such a good night.  We played our fun, new game Headbanz.  I love it because it's so simple for a family of all ages.  Even the little guys.  It feels good to be back on my feet again.  A heart a little bit heavier by losing a baby, but I know I have a beautiful someone waiting for me in Heaven.

A Pain I Never Wanted to Understand

Everything's stopped in our house. The cleaning, homeschooling.... I'm just laying down a lot.  The house looks like the pits.  Stomach hurts still and my back.  Today the pain was bad.  Not horrible but enough to make me catch my breath.  Tomorrow I go in to have a look inside through an ultrasound.  Hopefully everything is good and healthy.  I found out today that when I was in bed that day miscarrying, Kyle was standing outside my door crying.  Charles told me that when he rushed home to be with me, he found Kyle like that.  I feel so sad I didn't know.  No matter how I felt, I would have brought him in, pushed away the pain and just hugged him.  Makes me sad.

I'm tired of laying around.  Every time I say I'm done just laying around, I'm knocked back on my back from exhaustion or from pain.  So I'm taking this week and this is the first time I'm not gonna fight it.  I don't ever take a week off from my work.  I don't like doing that.  I have to though because whenever I think about going back to my daily routine I just feel more tired.  Do I really work that hard every day?  Wow.  I guess I'm always so full of energy I can't ever stand to just sit around.  I enjoy being busy.  I told my husband I have no energy and it must be hard for people who always feel like this to be motivated.  He said, "Welcome to my world."  Really?  Wow, that would be hard.  

Since it's only been two days since miscarrying, I hope the energy comes back soon.  I always think I'm fine and then I just break down sobbing several times a day.  How do people just throw away their babies by choice?  Thousands upon thousands?  Oh gosh.  I'm crying over my little 9 week sweetie in the womb and people walk to the abortion clinic like it's going to the dentist.  What has happened to our nation? God, help us!  These are real human beings we are talking about with their very personality and looks written right into their DNA.  My kids' personalities still are a lot like when they were even in my tummy.  Kyle, my wild one, was also wild in my stomach. That boy would use my hip bones as a jumping point.  He was a very painful boy to hold in my tummy.  Guess what?  He's the same way now. 

I had some warning signs about this pregnancy not going well.  First off, I had told Ivy in the beginning that I would soon start to have morning sickness.  I've always had it with every pregnancy.  She asked me almost every day of those few weeks if I had started getting sick.  I kept saying no.  I wasn't worried till I had hit the 8 week mark and still no sign of morning sickness.  I thought that was a little odd.  Another thing is the word miscarriage kept going through my mind the entire time since I got pregnant.  I just kept brushing it away in my mind because I thought it was just me being worried.  I've always had good, strong babies.  I even started writing on my wall calendar each week that I was progressing in pregnancy.  Every Thursday it would be another week.  I started writing them ahead of time.  I always write all the way up to week 40 for every pregnancy.  It's just fun to stare at it every now and then and count down.  Something told me to stop and so I did.  Then I tried to ignore it by going to week 20.  Then I quit there.  Sigh. Woman's intuition?  I don't know. I know next time I'm pregnant I'm not complaining about morning sickness.  I'm gonna rejoice.  For me it's a sign of a healthy pregnancy. 

I'm sorry to the mommies for all the times I didn't understand what it was like for you to miscarry.  Many a times I've had mommies tell me.  I would tell them I'm so sorry yet not truly understand.  It's so much worse than I thought....

Simplify Your Life! 40 Bags in 40 Days.

Someone started an idea for 40 bags in 40 days.  Meaning, every day find things to donate and fill up one bad.  Well, that's not hard for me AT ALL.  Nine people in this house means lots of clutter adds up really fast.  Back in my single days I was so simplistic I was probably considered a minimalist.  I get soooo confused when there is just too much stuff in the house.  I don't like figurines or any sort of collectible.  My kids are what I looove to give my time too.  Not things.  So maybe when they're all grown up I'll find something worth collecting.  I don't know.  I was like that when I was single anyway.

 

Our biggest inspiration when we do a house clean out is from the show Clean House.  No matter how many times we've seen all the episodes from every season, we'll watch it again.  I'll have the show playing somewhere on a monitor, streaming through Netflix, so it encourages the kids and I.  I'm not kidding, it works!!  You can get all the seasons on Netflix.  It just is so motivating to see people clear out their house.  Often you'll see people come to the realization that they've attached memories to junk and it's done nothing but take up space in their house and in their mind. 

Anyway, we are on our second day and working on our second bag!  For us that would be a large bag but for some people maybe it's just a smaller size bag.  Whatever works! Back to work we go!  :D

Messy Toddler in the House!

 

My little toddler is like a tornado that runs through the house and destroys everything.  I love her like crazy, but yikes!  Juliet is like the queen of destruction!  Haha.  She empties out the bookshelf every single day.  As soon as I catch her I immediately tell her no and pull her hand away. This must've been when I used the restroom.  Yeah, cause I keep an eye on her like a hawk.  The girl doesn't go anywhere without me knowing where she is at all times. 

 

All my kids loved to make tents around the age 6-10.  Well, this time it's my girls.  They are occupying space in the living room for their tent.  The hard part was keeping baby Juliet from pulling it down.  Man, my kids are gonna grow up with some serious patience.  Ladies and gentleman, these kids with be TRAINED with patience.  They constantly have a toddler in the house and don't mind it one bit.  They've just learned to put their valuables up a little higher.  Juliet's lucky because she has so many to go to for comfort and snuggles and they give it to her.

Baby and me. My little messy one.  She was upset but the moment I put the camera on her she smiled.  Such a girl. 

Decluttering My Crazy Messy Kitchen

As much as I straighten and wipe down the kitchen after these messy kids, it just needs a deep, deep cleaning quite often. One day I just was rummaging through the cupboards when I realized how badly it needed the red carpet treatment. Taking every single thing out of the cupboards, sanitizing all inside and outside of the cupboards, putting back what I want to keep and getting rid of the rest. Wow, I had more crammed in the cupboards than I thought. It was out of control. I think I'm getting rid of about half of what was in there.

Being the way I am, things get messy before I realize it. The only way I can get a handle on it is to constantly do these declutter sessions. I never, ever see a problem till it becomes a mountain. I haven't got a handle on the maintaining. Here's why. I am crazy about my kids and spend every waking moment with them. Literally. They are homeschooled as well. I can't imagine a minute apart from them. I play with them, teach them, cuddle them, and I probably say I love you at least 10 times a day to each kid. I blink and it seems we're having so much fun the house just falls apart in the process. I'm not addicted to cleaning. I'm addicted to my kids. I don't worship my kids and they know it. We just love living life together and experiencing everything together.

To battle the problem of clutter I have to constantly take turns going thru rooms and clearing them out. I like the idea I heard recently about having a weekly rotation where I pick one room to really focus on. Of course I have my daily chores. For example. This week I'm focusing on kitchen. I'm doing more than the usual wipe down. Whew. Tons of work. I wish I could snap my fingers and it's done so I can spend more time with my family. ;)

I told the kids on Monday that if they'll help me clear out the cupboards I'd do the scrub down. It wasn't an easy job for them because we didn't know of all that was crammed in there. Wow!

How Do Some Moms Do It All?

 

I've been a little frustrated by how quickly the kids mess up the house.  Arghhhhh!!!!  We have such a good chore system in place but the kids wreck it soooo fast!  Even though the rules are no drinks or food back in the rooms, I find stashed dishware.  Today the girls woke up to ants in their room because they spilled a Koolaid drink they snuck in.  Oh my word.  I can't explain the frustration I feel at times.  As hard as I work, I need them to understand how not to trash the house in between chore times.  With one or two kids I can see knowing who makes what mess so I can hold them accountable.  With seven kids it feels impossible to know.  Usually by the time I find the mess they don't remember who did it.  A ghost named "not me" did it.  I'm gonna find that ghost and tell him to please find another home. 

I continually get rid of stuff to make cleaning easier but I don't want to be a freak mom that just has nothing in her house.  Literally, the kids each have maybe one medium size bin of toys.  They've even gotten used to not holding attachment to things because we declutter about every 3 months.  I make sure I never rid of something they really love but if I feel they have an attachment to duplicate items I'll make them pair down. One of my biggest frustrations is understanding how some moms can have a lot of kids and keep a decent house.  HOOOOOW?  Is it they clean all the time?  Their kids go to school and therefore not home to make messes all day?  Does the mom clean too much and ignore kids?  Does mom NEVER just hang out with kids and have fun?  Do they have an awesome gene and I just need to get down on my knees and beg God for it too?  LORD!  Deliver unto me that awesome gene!  Sigh. 

Okay, I know I have to give myself a break.  I homeschool five out of seven children.  I have a close friendship with each one of my kids.  I love to sit on their beds and have discussions of whatever they need to talk about.  I love to take each kid on a date as much as possible.  Sometimes we do group fun and sometimes individual dates.  I need each of my kids to feel they are so special to me.  I love they feel like they can come to me about anything and I'll always make the time.  Just one question....

HOW DO SOME MOMS DO IT ALL???  Please share.  ;)  I need the awesome gene.

Finally Mastering the Art of Less Clutter

This past week I have come to realize what a huge difference and change that has happened in me as far as housework goes within the last year.  It used to be that we had so much stuff I felt I cleaned alllll day.  If someone was to come over then I actually dreaded it because it meant I had to clean the whole house.  Trust me, it was a lot.  We just had TOO much stuff and the kids would scatter it everywhere.  Daily.  If we knew someone was coming over that night then we would start cleaning early morning to get it all done in time.  I know.  Sooooo sad.  I finally just got fed up with the stuff and started dumping it all.  Needless to say, I have learned to not get attached to junk.  That's all it really is in the light of eternity and what really matters.  Proudly, the kids have learned this over the years and they do their own decluttering now. They hate clutter!  Haha.  I'm so happy.  The past few times we were gonna have people over I started to realize that we only had to pick up and clean in under an hour's time.  What a difference!!!  I used to dread someone coming over because it meant I had to freak out and clean like a mad woman for a day or sometimes even a day and a half.  My sis finally told me it was time to just get rid most of it. I really didn't know how till she taught me how to do the red carpet treatment.  Just bringing out everything from one room (except big furniture) and into the living room.  Put back what you what and donate the rest. It'll make you sweat but it works.  I was tired of my life revolving around clutter.  (I'll post a how to below)



My husband's been telling me I need to relax more.  I had even stopped blogging less and wanted to stay on top of things more.  Charles told me that I don't need to keep cleaning the same stuff over and over throughout the day.  It's okay if toys are out and things get a bit messy from play.  Just have fun with the kids, take time to blog or read a book, and enjoy life more!  We can all day basic chores throughout the day and get our work done, but we don't have to go in circles doing it.  I love my husband!  We all do our chores at noon where we are thorough but we do another big pickup just before he gets home so daddy can walk into a neat house.  :)  Since it only takes 1 hour to get our work done at noon, it's a pretty quick pickup by the end of the day. Man, decluttering like a mad lady was soooo worth it. When I do laundry I keep a donated bag nearby.  As I fold I can see what should be donated and put right into that bag.  It doesn't make it back into the kids' closet to decide later.  Right now I have a huuuuge donation bag just from doing this the last week of washing. 



Although I can be hard on myself, I'm glad I am. I'm happy I'm not okay with living in a life of clutter and feeling trapped.  It took me awhile to see how much our cleaning has changed and how much easier it's gotten.  I just realized it a couple days ago. I looked around, looked at my son and said, "Kyle, have to realized how easy our chores have gotten?"  He said, "No.  Just kidding, mom!  Yes, it's much faster to clean now!"  :D Ahhhhhh..... The constant learning, relearning, getting mad at the clutter and doing the work was worth it.  I'm now working on a full laundry system to make it more organized.  My sis gave me a great idea so we've been implementing it!

How to Do a Red Carpet Treatment

I say the "Red Carpet Treatment" because when we empty out a room, we put
it all onto the red carpet in our living room.  That way we aren't tripping over
stuff.  Yes, it got piled pretty high onto the rug and couch.  :)

1. Empty out one room completely as if you are moving except for major furniture you know is staying.  I moved everything into the living room.  

2. Get a bag or box labeled "Giveaway" and "Throwaway".  Then I put back what was obvious of what was going back into the room and I would put it back immediately.  As I was filling up the room with my favorites and for sure staying, I knew quickly when to stop because I loved how nice it looked.  I didn't want to reclutter it because the room looked so beautiful without all that stuff!  It made it sooo easy to throw all the rest out.

3.  At the end of the day take a break and go donate the stuff.  If you want to do a yard sale make sure to take the stuff OUT of the house completely.  I put everything onto our back patio.  

4.  Each day I did one room and I did not stop for 8 days.  I made sure each room was completely and totally done with all the messes cleaned up from it before starting the next room.  We ate very, very simple that week because I didn't need to be making bigger messes that would make me feel discouraged.  

5.  If you blog, blog your successes!  After my whole house was finished, since I didn't want to do a yard sale but my friend did, she came and picked up all the stuff off my patio.  Get rid of it fast!

Picking My Priorities: The Delicate Balance of Motherhood

I've been trying extra, extra hard to stay on top of my house work and get ahead before the new homeschool year starts. The hard part is staying balanced and not letting it overtake the time with my kids. I did make a schedule for myself that worked incredibly well a few years back but at times I kicked against it. I know that sounds odd but that's the little kid in me. When I follow the schedule, the house stays looking great. Well, I finally decided to woman up and try it again and the house is looking amazing. Even laundry piles shrinking. Boy, taking care of a big family is a lot of work but soooo worth it. I'm determined to not do any cleaning except for dinner cleanup after 5pm.  Mama has to have her breaks too. Sometimes I'm tempted to work on something but my grandmother (mother of nine) reminds me to not burn myself out. She's so right. I just need to enjoy my evenings. :D

I thought tonight I'd be helping out someone who's daughter got lice from a play center. (Totally keeping this anonymous.)  She called me up and asked for help, offered to pay, hearing that I knew how to get rid of it fast. I said no to the pay and just wanted to pay it forward. Awhile back my kids had gotten lice from other kids and I had poured money into trying to get rid of it. An angel lady just came to my rescue who gets rid of them for a living. She would accept no pay and totally wiped out the problem. Believe me, these places charge a lot. I learned from her and have had some opportunities to pay it forward and help others. What a blessing she was!  Turns out they can't come till tomorrow so I missed my session at the gym with my trainer. Well, Charles took 8 kids with him and I had the house alone for 3 hours. While he was GETTING HIS BUTT KICKED (haha) I didn't even know what to do with all the quiet! We were supposed to train together at the gym but since I wasn't there, he was the focus. Basically he came back and just collapsed in a chair. Haha!  He said, "Baby, she kicked my butt. She's your kind of trainer." I can't wait to get back to the gym for sure. ;)

P.S. If you see all my pics at the bottom of my posts that means I blogged from my phone rather than on computer. Blogger app needs to fix it and make options. ;)

Perfection is for Guest Visits Only - Not Everyday

Recently someone contacted me about possible being in a TV show and wondered if I was interested.  They were looking for families that feel like they don't have enough time together and would like to work on being closer together.  I thought about that and realized we don't qualify at all.  I constantly have thought about this and tend to evaluate where my relationship is with my husband and kids often.  I don't feel that I have any regrets in the area of spending time with my kids or husband.  No, I don't revolve everything around my kids but we do try and stay really connected.  I know, I know, I know that the key to being close with my kids when they are older starts when they are young.  I'm not going to wait to build a close relationship till they are adults.  I realize that now some of their concerns or small talk may be silly but it's important to listen because it'll gradually mature. I want them to know that if I'll listen now, I'll listen then.  I get sad when I hear people blow off their little one because the concern little Johnny is having seems silly.  It's important and really big to them. 



Most of my days consist of spending time with my kids and training them.  Often I won't blog or do anything else until I feel like I've met the needs as much as possible.  Ahem.  Hence the reason I tend to not blog AS often as I used to.  Sometimes at night when I'm thinking about getting on the computer, there has been several times that a kid needed to talk to me about something personal to them.  As much as I wanted my free time, I knew they really meant it.  I have a teenager in less than a month and another one in a year.  It's snowballing on me since I had three kids in three years when first starting a family. Their talks are getting more serious about issues of the heart.  I'm SOOO glad they feel they can open up. 

One of my three sons come up to me recently and told me they are experiencing thoughts in their head that are not good.  He said he fights them but they come back sometimes.  I asked in general what I thought it might be.  He looked embarrassed to tell me but did.  I said, "Well, I figured out the problem.  You are turning into a man.  You aren't there yet but what you are experiencing is temptation.  It's not a sin to be tempted.  Only when you let your thoughts dwell on them or you act on it."  He looked relieved and gave me a hug.  See?  It's stuff like that! I'm so glad they know they can trust me.  That they can openly talk to me.  Some day they will be grown up and out of the house.  I will make the time to be available because some day they won't be here and I can have all the time to do whatever I want.



My days can be sooooooooo hard at times and there are days I fall back in bed at night and just fall asleep almost before my head hits the pillow. It's a good kind of exhausted.  The kind that no matter how hard a large family can be, it is worth every minute of it.  My laundry piles rival the mountains and the dishes never, ever, ever end.  As soon as we clean it starts to fall apart but I'd rather just be happy for our two chore times a day than yell at them all day to quit messing up the house.  Yeah, it can get frustrating to have it look like it does at times but I realized that I was always going in circles after them to pick up, pick up, pick up.  I started to sound like a mean ol' broken record.  I finally settled on the fact that two chore times a day to pick up are sufficient and we can always do a perfect, to the T clean, if we have visitors.  So, if you walk in and my house looks perfect, you are the only reason why.  Perfection just isn't my cup of tea and couldn't be even if I wanted it.  Unless I want to go nuts.  Ha.

I'm No Supermom...Not by a Long Shot

I'm doing some research before I make a final decision about this upcoming school year. Basically, my kids are spoiled.  I think they are spoiled rotten at times.  Deprived you say?  Bwahaha!  My kids have memberships to the huge 3 story science center, a zoo membership, gym membership.  They don't have to wake up at the crack of dawn and they get to leasurely eat breakfast every morning.  While they lazily sip on their morning hot tea, they are either listening to a family bible study by me or watching an educational video.  School comes some time around 10am or maybe starts at 11am.  Depends on when mom's brain wakes up.  That only comes after a good dose of coffee.  They get done in a few hours, maybe only two if they really concentrate, and then they start their chores.  If they are lazy about it they finish in an hour.  When they are really good at it they are done in only a half hour.  Yeah, young ones have dissected and learned the insides of some animals before most kids ever get to.  It's weird having a five year old depressed because her older brother got to dissect a frog before she could.  Yeah, my kids have it amazingly good.  I don't have to worry about late nights at church and having to rush them to bed because of school in the morning.  We have such a good life. 

Do you think my kids would be at my feet thanking me for the good life they have?  Noooooo.... they think schooling takes too long and chores take to long.  They've completely forgotten their days of public school that they hated, hated, hated.  They hated the long days, hunger, and bullying. They hated getting lost in the system because the teacher had moved on before they were ready.  They hated the hurried lunches and the lame 5 minute recess.  Did you know they've cut recess waaaaaay down?  When I was a kid we had a good 20 minutes-30 minutes of recess.  I needed to get all that energy out.  I'm sure my teacher begged the principal to give me Benadryl each day.  Something to knock me out so she could peacefully teach the rest of the class.  A week ago I told them I wasn't sure about another year of homeschooling because they aren't appreciating it.  They all cried and hung on my leg.  Please noooooo!  I took a deep breath.  I thought about it while doing cardio at the gym, I thought about it while lifting weights.  I thought about it while swimming my midnight laps.  I thought about it while showering, eating, and just before dozing off.  I ran into a book that just made my heart leap for joy....

Click here to see on Amazon

Wow!  This is about 15 different families that are all in different situations and all homeschool differently.  I needed a way to keep the attention of my kids and it seems what I'm doing isn't working.  It's just not as exciting for them.  I've been devouring this book and can hardly put it down.  There are those perfect parents who seem like they have it all together and their three year old is learning calculus and then there are the ones.... like me.... that give so much to the kids that I'm just happy to shower that day.  Do you know why I go to workout at the gym after the kids are asleep?  Because that's when I have the time.  When I go it's usually 9:30pm-12:30am.  No, I don't sleep in all day.  Heck, I'm writing this at 2am because it's the only time I've had yet I still have to get up with the early risers.

I woke up to this the other day. Juliet trying to figure out how to get
out of her crib.  Okay, she's 12 months! Help!

I get excited when I find a book that just lifts my spirits when I'm lagging inside.  I don't have a homeschool co-op or a support group.  I wish I could have those cheer leaders on the sidelines but I don't.  I have to just keep my faith in God, relying on His strength, my mind in constant study, and my heart resting in God's grace.  That is the only way I can give sooooooooooo much of myself every day without cracking.  I'm no supermom.  Ha...  By a long shot.  I'm related to some but I'm not one.  I just have to work super hard.

 

Good news!  I'm down 10lbs!!!  Aaaaaagh!  NO CARBS and lots and lots of juicing and vegetables.  White meat more than red meat.  I'm learning to make really yummy food and I can eat LOTS of it!  I will share soon on a great Souperman food I now make. Get it?  It's a soup but man, oh man, is it packed of good stuff.  Superman himself might be knocking on my door soon for the recipe. 

Back From a Long Internet Break

This week I am watching an extra 3 kids and I've never seen my house so wrecked! No joke.  It's a mess.  That doesn't mean we don't clean.  It just means that we clean and clean and it goes right back.  I have chores set out for the kids that are here for the week and they do them but it all goes right back to the mess.  Yesterday we even cleaned for 3 hours.  I went into boot camp mama mode and said whatever is on the floor goes in the trash.  I wasn't joking because 2 very large black bags later, the floor was picked up.  Believe me, I gave plenty of warning.  Moms don't have to live their lives as cleaning slaves.  We are so much more than that.  So, I'll get off my box now. 

Other than the constant messes we have been having fun going swimming at our new gym, rock climbing, and just hanging out places.  Ryan's been having fun shooting off fireworks in the area and I think it's time we launch our huge rocket we bought awhile back.  Heh heh.  Well, I'm able to bring the extra kids to my gym but I'm not allowed to check them into the child watch which means no working out this week.  Phooey.  This fat will have to sit for a bit longer.

Anyway, I went on a loooong internet break and I decided it's been a good long time.  Man, it felt good too.  That's the longest we have ever done.  It's kind of like going on a food fast and getting cleansed.  There are just so many distractions and my kids were never wanting to play outside.  Today I am working on all the safety features to protect our kids.  We use Safe Eyes and have really loved it. 

*My friends, if you see me doing guest posts or posts for products, I try not to make it excessive.  I do try to earn money for my family on the side through writing.  If it's not something you are interested in seeing, please just scroll right past to the next post.  :)  I write because I love to!

A Detailed Chore Chart for Large Families-Works for Us!

I've had some people ask if I would show what kinds of chores each kid does everyday.  So I figured I'd take a picture of the cards and post them here.  I really believe that each child should have a specific chore because if clear lines aren't drawn then the older could end up doing the bulk of the work. Then I'd see the younger trying to get away with a lot.  This way I can see who did their chore and who did not.  It starts every day in the To Do folder and as each chore is done they go down into the Finished folder.  :)



Starting with youngest to oldest.  Here is 3 year old Caleb's card.

 

 

Here are 5 year old Ashley's cards below:

 

 

7 year old Ivy's chore cards below:

 

 

9 year old Kyle's chore cards below:

 

 

11 year old Ryan's chore cards below:

 

 

12 year old Chaz's chore cards below:

 

 

If they don't finish their chores and homeschool by 3:30pm then they get to pick from the Extra Chore list to add to their regular chores:

 

 

Here is another list we have posted.  The two top ones are for me.  I have a schedule for clothes being washed.  They know to have the clothes they need washed in the hamper by their scheduled day or mama doesn't wash it.  The weekly chores is the extra chores I do on top of my regular daily chores.  The bottom is Saturday chores for all of us. :)

 

 

Hope this helps!

 

We have been following this system for five years and absolutely love it. Each kid is held accountable for their own area.  We pay for the chores they do to understand working.  They aren't paid a lot because I really feel these things should be done to be taught responsibility.  The other part of me wants for them to understand the reward of hard work and how someday they'll be working for money.  That's why we don't pay a lot but enough to help them see the reward.  They get paid biweekly like daddy does.  Some kids spend it right away and others save it for bigger things. :)