Monday, April 04, 2011

Comments on Family Size

Recently on my facebook page, Yes, They're All Mine, I left this comment:

Twice in one day I was told I don't have kids, I have a litter. I'm exhausting the world's resources, hurting my husband by forcing kids on him, etc. To that I say "I love my family and there is nothing you can do to make me change my mind about it. Might as well stop trying."

Sane Woman's Guide to Raising a Large Family, AI'm reading a great book called A Sane Woman's Guide to Raising a Large Family and it's an excellent book.  I have to share with you a page that made a lot of sense to me.

   "Some people will come right out and call you crazy.  More tactful souls will think of ways to ask without quite asking.

"Won't you be glad to be done with diapers?"
 "Aren't you glad you're not nursing anymore?"
 "Isn't it nice that your kids are getting so independent?"
The questions can get tiring.  Once we broke the half-dozen barrier, however, people started to lose hope that we'd ever make normal choices anytime soon.  They began to opt for the resigned but still curious, "When are you going to do it again?"
I've wondered why people seem so interested in another family's choices.  In many cases I think they're simply seeking to validate their own choices. 

A large family disturbs folks: it makes them reexamine their own choices."

I've noticed that even little girls have their own ideas on mothering and tend to be bossy while playing together.  The idea of bossing seems to be endless as moms constantly compare themselves to each other and think that we're all going to think alike. We're not.  There is no one certain mold. Yes, there has been times that we soared financially and had plenty of money to eat out, goof off, go on adventures as a family.  Other times we've hurt so bad we were counting our pennies.  Just depending on the economy.  There have been times I was brought to my knees praying to God because I wasn't sure how we were gonna make it the next week.  Through the bountiful times and through the dry valleys, God has continued to provide. 

I was proud to be an aunt for
the first time when I was 17
I'll never forget something that happened to us back when we had 2 kids in 2001. I knew I wanted more kids but looking at our finances, it just didn't seem feasible.  While my husband was working a man came in that he'd never met. He walked up to Charles and said, 
"I don't know why but I feel like God is wanting me to tell you that He has a blessing on families.  As you have kids God will provide. Just trust him."
We couldn't believe it and it was no coincidence by any means.  This is back when we lived in a tiny apartment with debt.  

About 2 years later an evangelist came in our church that I'd never met and he called me up.  He said that I need to really pray about decisions and listen to God.  God is really going to help us but we need to learn to hear His voice when praying about something we are having to decide on. Sure enough within a couple of months we made two huge decisions.  Buying a car and buying a new home.  When things were looking bad, I just had to remember to listen to Him.  By the tuggings in my heart, we were able to make good decisions and avoid the bad.  We now have a car, minivan and a large van to fit our family size and we were able to have a home built within our financial means without going over budget. Did I mention we also had paid of all our debt?  God has been so good to us.  

God DOES have His blessing on family.  Whether you have 1 kid or 20, don't let anyone pressure you into thinking kids only exhaust the world's resources or that you are doing a disservice to your other kids.  My kids often beg me to give them another sibling. I feel that I have the perfect fit right now and I'm enjoying what God has given me for this season of my life. Who knows what the future holds?  

As much as I've studied the bible I just can't seem to find any scriptures where God says to limit family size or use some birth control.  Let me know if you find one. 

Interesting articles to read: The Truth about Birth Control

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