Friday, August 07, 2009

Overproofing Your Baby

"The Kiddie-Safety Industrial Complex wants me to danger-proof my house, yard, and car to within an inch of my child's life. Why I'm not buying what they're selling."

While taking a nice hot bath to help my back feel better, I cracked open a new Reader's Digest to relax. I came across this article, Bubble Babies, and had quite a chuckle remembering back when I was a new parent. It's worth reading to hear about the different things they have out for babies and hearing some opinions on it.

This is funny. Okay, so I remember when I was pregnant with my first. We got an invitation in the mail to attend a seminar about baby safety. To lure me, they offered food. Well... offering free food to a pregnant lady is like asking a kid if they want a bag of candy. Off I waddled on the scheduled date with my husband. After all, I was concerned about my baby's safety. The one that was still tucked away safely in my womb. I should have walked out when I saw the table of dried out bagels and the stale coffee. We sat down and a fast talking guy stood in the front telling us about every danger you can possibly think of. I mean, the freakish things that can happen that you NEVER hear of. He shows us an interesting (ugly) crib that his company makes that is so safe, an overweight adult could get inside and jump up and down as hard as possible and that crib won't break. Ohhhhh.... so this whole meeting was about selling a VERY expensive crib. It was plain and ugly. Incredibly safe though to you psycho moms who not only can't wait to jump with your kids in their bed, but you just have to climb in and jump with them while they're still tots. I mean, I've had quite a few temptations, haven't you? This crib that this guy was selling was for $700. Every parent in that meeting was a first time parent. Do you know how many couples got in line and bought one right then at there? At least half of the people there were lined up to buy. I mean, he really freaked us out with some crazy injury stories and even death. Although he freaked me out a little, I knew I could safely pick out a crib that had the right bar spacing and was sturdy enough for a crazy toddler to jump up and down in. My husband and I grabbed one last bagel and walked out.
An added note: I do at times lie down and night, in the dark, thinking about opportunities missed. I mean, I could go in Ashley's room RIGHT NOW and be jumping in her crib with her. Sigh. Sacrifices we sometimes make for the sake of saving money.


Anonymous said...

Your so funny! We never bought the toilet lock either, even after Cupcake threw our Sky remote in there. The best thing I ever bought are baby gates, that open like a door. No more tripping as I climb over the stupid things.

momto9 said... gates, electrical outlet covers and shoe laces to tie up my bottom kitchen cupboards:) The last one is more for my sanity than safety though:):)

Daddy Forever said...

We don't need a crib like that. Right now, we have problems with the older kids crawling into bed with us in the middle of the night.