Thursday, May 10, 2012

My Insecure Mind Battle as a Mom

The chickens come to our door every morning asking for Cheerios
Apparently they like it more than chicken feed.
Luckily, I've been reading a book called A Mom Just Like You.  I need it badly right now.  I relate to some things this large family mom is talking about.  I relate to her constantly wondering if she is good enough in everything she does.  Will I ever be caught up on laundry, house work?  The homeschooling issue really hit home for me.  It's not that I completely distrust schools because I know there are some fantastic teachers out there.  However, my kids flourish 100 times more with me and do great on their state testing when they do take it.  They flourish in the way of their attitudes, love for God, not feeling negative peer pressure nonstop, and they have much more respect towards adults in general.  It IS my job to raise them up in Christ and I felt like every day that I was sending them off, I had to fight "something" every time they came back home.  It felt like I was just retraining every single day.  Am I 100% qualified to homeschool?  Well, of course not.  I'm sure I have the grammar police right now freaking out reading this.  However, I LOVE to learn with my kids.  I truly love being with them every day and never have any regrets.  Having all 6 kids home and being pregnant truly plays a factor in how easy it gets messy and I keep forgetting that.  Like they say, it's like shoveling snow while it's still snowing.  Little stinkers.  They make life so wonderfully difficult.

You know, Caleb is a HUGE fan of the Cars cartoon and insists he sees it on the iPad every day.  He knows how to maneuver through that iPad like an adult can.  Well, often he thinks he owns that iPad and apparently even takes it to bed with him. He's two.  This is how I found him napping.  It would be nice if I could have my iPad back but Apple made it so cool for kids that I literally end up having to share it with 7 other people in this house.  

You know how people say that each kid you have needs their own space?  They fret over how many rooms they have in the house.  Don't kids need their own beds and their own room?  Look, I have tried to give them their own space and no one wants it.  This is how I found the kids while checking on them in the middle of the night and this was AFTER I transferred Ivy to her room.  There are 4 kids in this picture crammed like sardines on one bed.  It is not uncommon that I'll find all six kids on the bed like that.  They just prefer to all stick together.  Yeah, you can tell they are all crying about needing more space.


I was kinda feeling guilty about always sitting down whenever I had contractions and being that I don't want to end up having this baby late I took 4 of the kids to the park.  I didn't take Caleb because there is A LOT of water around.  It was soooo pretty.  Did I get any contractions?  Nooooo.... of course not when I'm actually willing to walk around and egg them on.  Well, I tried so I will tell the doctor I did give it some brief thought and followed through...


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