Thursday, November 16, 2006

Thursday Thirteen #14



Thirteen Reasons My Grandpa Got Kicked Out of Walmart




1. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies rest rooms.

3. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

4. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

5. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told of the shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

6. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

7. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

8. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

9. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

10. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

11. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

12. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

13. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"


26 comments:

Anthony said...

That's too funny. We used to do the alarm clock thing when we were kids.

Anthony said...

That's too funny. We used to do the alarm clock thing when we were kids.

Mama Duck said...

ROTFL!! Oh my goodness!!

Melissa said...

Wow! Very funny. Definitely caught my attention!

Anonymous said...

That was soooo Funny!!

Goofy Girl said...

Hahahahha!! I want to come with him to Walmart! Sounds like a fun time!

Le laquet said...

Sounds like my dad! Does every family have one of these?

He embarasses my mum in our local supermarket by shouting really loudly "don't you ever, ever touch me in public like that again!" And then skipping away a la Follow the Yellow Brick Road!

He'll be 71 in February :o)

Anonymous said...

I think he's my hero.

I must send this to my friend, whose husband is a manager at Wal-mart in Tennessee. (Her best friend is a Kentucky state trooper.)

Anonymous said...

This is one of the funniest TT's I have read. He sounds like an unique person to be around. Do you sometimes want to say, "who is that man"?

Happy TT

Jane said...

Well, your granpa sounds like a load of fun!!!! Has he been banned from all WalMarts or just one???
Thanks for stopping by my T13.

BlueBugg said...

LOL, that gave me a good giggle ;) Thankyou!

le laquet: rofl at your Dad!

Unknown said...

That´s way too funny!

Happy TT form Germany,

S. (dying by laughter)

Mia said...

Lol...thats great!

Happy TT!

Sparky Duck said...

LOL, you have to be kidding me

Anonymous said...

wait...is this a joke?
either way...it's freakin' hilarious!

Domestic Goddess said...

sounds like fun times!

Anonymous said...

So awesome!!

Melissa H. said...

OMG! Sounds like your grandfather is a bit of a troublemaker! And too funny to boot! My dad would say all those things sound like fun....maybe one day my kids could write something like this about him!

13 Reasons I'm Thankful for my Mom

Meggie Mom Fantastic said...

Oh that is the funniest thing I've read in a very long time!!!

JAM said...

Your kids have a lot to live up to with Grandad around. He'll be teaching them all his tricks. Sounds like you have a great family, it's much better being around jokers than overly serious types.

Anonymous said...

That is soo funny....I've gotten kicked out of a Kmart for playing Marco Polo in the isles...

Anonymous said...

That's hilarious! ;)

Karianne said...

Jenny, I did my first TT post today and found your blog! Thanks for the laugh, I sure needed it! If you get a chance, please visit my new blog, PracticingContentment, and let me know how I'm doing! Nice to find you,
Karianne

K said...

Did he really do all those things?? I've read most of those on a list I was emailed a long time ago, "25 Things To Do In Wal-Mart" or something.

Anyway, a funny list!!

Daniella said...

That was awesome! So awesome in fact, that I just had to share. So I've emailed all my friends with a link to your site to check it out. Hope you don't mind the extra hits.

I'm still giggling - thanks for the uplift, I needed it today.

DigiscrapMom said...

Very funny! Thanks for making me giggle today :)

Happy weekend!