Monday, February 04, 2013

Psycho Neighbors & Precious Foster Kids

I had the CrAziEsT thing happen to me this past week. You are never gonna believe it.  Well, I get this letter from a neighbor directly across the street from me.  She is cussing me out and just ripping me up and down.  My mouth was just hanging open reading it because we had a pretty good relationship. Apparently, a neighbor called CPS (Child Protective Services) on her concerning the foster kids that live there.  She just assumed it's me because of something that was mentioned in the report. I replied with shock that I didn't call on her but she just kept calling me a liar, cussing me out,  and threatening me. 

Okay, I've had her kids over since 2007. I LOVE her kids.  Her daughter can be a little on the bratty side but she's still a little cutie aside from being disrespectful at times.  Her son on the other hand is a total sweetie and VERY respectful.  I especially loved having him over and would pretty much let him come visit whenever he wanted.  He got along fantastic with my boys and would play for hours at my house.  A few months ago my neighbor got several foster kids to live in her house.  Two of them were these little sweet brothers.  I knew their story and knew that they had experience some serious trauma. However, they also were welcome in my home and I loved talking with them.  I could tell they gone through some seriously rough times but they were a joy to have around. 

Often I would hear my neighbor's kids calling the foster kids "retarded" and "stupid."  If they did it at my house I would put a stop to it immediately.  Seriously, these kids have gone through enough and just need a safe haven where they are accepted and cared for just as they are.  They don't need more insult to injury.  I told the kids, "As long as you are in my house you will not call these boys names.  You will treat them respectfully or you can leave."  The girl replied, "Well, they ARE stupid."  I leaned down to the boy, took his hand in mine, and told him he was not stupid and that Jesus loves him very, very much. I said, "He loves you just as you are and you are a gift from him.  Don't EVER let anyone tell you otherwise."  My heart broke for him. I started to pray for these two boys along with my family.  One day one of the boys asked for a slice of pizza I said "Sure!" as he was walking out the door. He was just about to take a bite of the pizza outside when the neighbor girl ripped it from his hands and shouted at him, "You can't have that!!!"  I asked her to give it back to him and by this time we were in ear shot of her mother sitting nearby.  The little girl ran away with the pizza.  She shouted at me that they were muslim and they don't eat pork. I told her that the boy is not muslim so give the pizza back.  Finally, after the girl kept smart mouthing me the mother lazily said, "Give the pizza back."  Good grief. 

Well, recently I was walking down the street to return a dog to a neighbor.  We started talking and she asked me who the kids were that were living there.  I told her they were foster kids.  She obviously didn't like our mutual neighbor and ranted about her for a bit.  She said that she recently saw the little foster boy trying to run away. He was crying and saying he didn't want to live there anymore. The little neighbor was running after him and screaming.  I told the neighbor how I had recently had the kids over for pizza and I had been able to get to know the foster boys a little bit. Well, she told me she was thinking about calling CPS on our neighbor for some various reasons.  I eventually said goodbye and felt yucky about being in the middle of some dispute they have had going.

I guess the neighbor made that call anonymously and BOY did I pay for it!!  She had lied to CPS saying that I had said the kids were starving and so I HAD to feed them pizza.  Such a set up!  Well, my neighbor of the foster kids knows I'm the only one that fed her kids pizza so it was pinned on me.  Since the call was made anonymously I can't have them clear my name to get angry neighbors off my back.

It's been horrible since then. I've tried several times to tell her I have not called CPS. The replies are off the charts mad.  I was told I'll be hunted and I'm gonna regret what I did.  Her kid wrote me a mean message.  A elderly lady (pretty sure it was her mom I had met before) was yelling out racist comments from across the street.  Charles tried to go across and tell her we didn't call CPS on them and make peace with her. She started screaming and freaking out acting like she was gonna get attacked. Then I got another nasty letter warning us to stay off her property. My gosh.  I have psycho neighbors.  With what I've been seeing, the anger issues and threatening, I do hope the boys are taken.  I'm sure they don't need anymore trauma or people with rage issues caring for them.  I cringe thinking if this is what I see in public, what goes on behind closed doors?

I KNOW there are GOOD foster parents out there. It's just like any situation, just because there are mean foster parents doesn't mean EVERYONE is a mean foster parent.  It's just situations like this that give it a bad name. CPS won't clear my name since that neighbor lady reported anonymously. I think the lady will just believe what she wants to believe and no one will change her mind.  I'm just the "white lady" (her words) living across from her who has too much time on her hands.  Sunday afternoon after getting her last bit of hate mail I just cried.  I told God my heart was hurting so, so bad.  I prayed that God would help me forgive her. I prayed for those two boys and I especially prayed that God would work in her son's heart that had recently come to church with us.  He has such a soft heart for God. It's scary opening your heart up to people sometimes. I'm not gonna close up my heart to people just because I have a psycho neighbor across from me. I'm not gonna close my heart up to family just because of  a few hateful ones that hate large families. I even have some reading my blog right now that will never call to say hi and only report and complain to other family members. No matter, I don't write for them.  I write for me. I write because I like to document changes, share pictures, share with some really GREAT blogging friends, and because I hope that sometimes what I write can be encouraging to others.  I'm pretty sure writing about my psycho neighbor won't encourage anyone but it just helps me to get it off my chest. Thank you.  :) I'm getting an order of protection this week. :D Yay for me.  I feel even better. 


Happy Elf Mom (Christine) said...

Praying the order of protection goes through. And for those kids.

Do try not to let this change the person you are. It's going to be a long road ahead and it doesn't look like this is all over at all. I'm so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Coming from a former foster parent, PLEASE call your local foster agency! Verbal abuse is even more psychologically damaging for these kids than physical abuse! And I'm sorry you had to go through that. :(

Virginia Revoir said...

Actually, I have been wanting to do that but have no idea how since there are several. I will research it tomorrow for sure

Unknown said...

Ah that really REALLY stinks. I cannot imagine what you are having to deal with. The Internet can be pretty unforgiving sometimes but at least you can somewhat get away from it. A neighbor on the other hand, not so easy. They are pretty much always there. Praying that things get better and that God changes your neighbor's heart. AND I do agree that you need to contact Foster Care. Those children need a family, but not that family!!

(((HUGS))) :)

Windy said...

I completely understand you wanting an order of protection. Seems people are filled with rage with no control at times. I pray you and your family will be safe. When dealing with someone so unreasonable, you just don't know what to expect. Keep being the sweet caring person you are...there are lots of people who enjoy your blog and pictures. :-D

Karen said...

Despite the probable fallout...I'd urge you to call CPS and let them know how she is acting...totally not appropriate! And people like that give the good foster parents a bad name!

Virginia Revoir said...

I called the day I wrote this and gave a full report. I also reported that I was threatened if I did so. The kids are too important.

momto9 said...

WOW just WOW!!!! :( Why cant I have a neighbour like you guys!!! Some neighbours are just super weird!

The Father of Five said...

Sounds as if this neighbor is dealing with some significant mental health disorders of her own.

You will be unable to reason with the unreasonable.