Thursday, May 13, 2010

Caleb Is Crawling!

Oh man, Caleb is 8 months old now so I should have suspected that he would be crawling. I know babies usually crawl sooner but I really tried to prolong it. A little tiny baby crawling around my tiled house with other kids can be scary. So he's always been in a small playpen, high chair, or saucer. Despite me trying not to let him grow up so fast, all I did was set him down for 5 minutes at a birthday party and he crawled away. It took him only a few minutes to figure out how to move his legs forward. Now, Caleb is not so happy being put in something stationary. He wants to take off and get into everything. Argh! Haha. Sniff.... it always starts here and then they go crazy and learn everything.

So after he masters crawling in 10 minutes, he decides that that's not good enough, so he stands up!

Oh my goodness.  My baby is growing.  My oldest two sons walked at 10 months old so I'm really hoping Caleb doesn't follow the trend.  Whyyyyyy do kids have to keep growing up so fast?  I know it's a blessing.  But I am not looking forward to my kids going into teens and then moving out.  I know I'll have a teen in 3 years but I try not to think about it. 

You know, when I was a teen I DID NOT like kids.  I ONLY babysitted for the money.  For some reason I always attracted kids to me.  I never tried to.  One time I opened the door to my church and I heard "Jennyyyy!" by a whole herd of kids. They all ran to me and hugged me until I fell down.  I hated it!  I just wasn't a kid friendly person.  I mean, I was NICE to them.  I just had no desire to babysit, volunteer in church nursery.  Nothing. 

Then the miracle happened after I got married just 11 months later.

I found out I was pregnant with my first baby.

It took me a bit to get used to changing diapers, making bottles, hardly sleeping.  It took a LOT of my selfishness to die.  I certainly didn't really want anymore for some time because I could not get over the fact that my sleep was deprived.  Then something else happened when Chaz was ONLY 3 months old.

I found out I was pregnant again.

I still remember my dad saying he was worried about me.  He knows me well.  He knew I was still the same Jenny.  Still the same girl that cared only about her needs more than anyone else's. 

It was my second that started to break me.  I started to cuddle more with my little ones.  It was a slow transformation in my heart.  I started to have some fun.  I started not minding all the nursing and eventual bottle feedings.  The selfishness started to break away.  I still LOVED my sleep and I got pretty cranky about it.  Every time I got woken up in the middle of the night my husband says I would say under my breath, "No more kids."

Then the miracle happened.  I finally figured out kids are great! Kids let you learn life all over again through a younger mind!  I no longer rushed my kids if they wanted to bend down and smell a flower.  I now had a reason to go down every single aisle at Toys R Us just to look at all the fun toys!  When my kids want to get on a bike and try it out around the bike aisles, go for it! 

Then one day I threw my birth control pills away forever.  It's been 8 years since I did and 4 more kids later.  I'm still having fun.  It's an adventure to find more fun kid places to go to. It's hard for me to understand when parents never want to do something just for the kids. I think when your selfishness dies, you find joy into watching your kids eyes light up and hearing their giggles.  It's fun to go to the skating rink just to see their wobbly legs learn how to skate.  Christmas is no longer really about you.  The kids can't understand why mom and dad are happy without receiving a present.  I know why.  Because it's a gift just to watch the kids open presents and express their excitement and wonder over their new toy.  I don't always feel like putting up a Christmas tree but my kids still find it wonderful to decorate it and see the lights. 
Now, when my little baby wakes up in the middle of the night, I smile because he's worth losing sleep over.  I get to give him some kisses, a bottle, and snuggle him back to sleep. 

Thank God He gave me these little wonders.

I needed them.

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