Don't You Feel Seven Kids is Enough?

I'm in such a weird stage of my life.  I never thought about it coming.  EVER.  I'm 35 and I've been blessed with 7 beautiful, fun, amazing, challenging, heart wrenching, adventurous kids.  One is in heaven, although it's heartbreaking, I'm excited to meet someday.  ;) 

Last week I dismantled the crib for the first time in 14 years.  Not super excited about it.  Why am I feeling that way?  Aren't some parents happy to get out of those diaper and crib stages?  Doesn't it mean less physical slavery work but more drama? (Older kids come with more drama.)  Ha.  I wasn't happy about putting the crib in the garage.  I was sad. I love the little pitter-patter of the feet across the house.  I love the kisses and babbling.  I don't care about all the diaper changes.  I've never had a break so far for 14 years and that's just fine with me.  

On the other side of it, no more babies means less work, less sleepless nights, no strollers, no diapers, no crib, no packing a diaper bag, no nursing, no binkies, no bottles.....

I don't know...... I'm extremely content.  The weirdest thing is before I got pregnant with baby Genesis that we lost, I constantly was setting out 10 dinner plates.  We'd be sitting at the table and I'd look around to see who was missing.  It would dawn on me that we are only a family of nine.  I'm talking about for months I did this.  Once I got pregnant and lost the baby, I've never accidentally done this again. Weird, huh?  My heart hurts thinking about never, ever having a little baby in my tummy again.  Never again experiencing the miracle of birth. I don't mind waking up to those newborn cries a zillion times a night.  I'm so used to it now.  And believe me, it's not baby fever.  I have person fever.  Every single kid I have is so uniquely different that I just love learning about each one of them and I love their differences!  It's so fun to see all the different personalities.
 

 

I'm sure lots of people go through these feelings.  I just don't personally know anyone.  If I express these feelings to people in my life they'd most likely say, "Well, don't you feel seven is enough?"  When did it ever become a number?  They are not a group to me.  I know each and every kid personally.  I make it a point to spend personal time with each one.  And boy, I enjoy it!  Yes, it's sooooo much work.  Yes, housekeeping is a battle for me because it's getting messy as we're cleaning.  Okay, so what?  Who said a perfect house even matters?  Good grief.  I love toys strewn across my house.  It shows we love living.  A perfect house just feels unlived in and kind of empty.  Besides, I have no friends that are perfectionists.  I find that personality a bit annoying.  (Sorry if I offended anyone).   I'm not saying I like it messy but to me there is a balance.  If you randomly show up at my house, it's gonna look lived in. 

When is it time to move forward?  I thought by now it'd be so obvious to me.  People have told me many, many times that you'll always just know when you are done.  Well, good grief, I'm still waiting for that definite feeling.

I'm No Supermom...Not by a Long Shot

I'm doing some research before I make a final decision about this upcoming school year. Basically, my kids are spoiled.  I think they are spoiled rotten at times.  Deprived you say?  Bwahaha!  My kids have memberships to the huge 3 story science center, a zoo membership, gym membership.  They don't have to wake up at the crack of dawn and they get to leasurely eat breakfast every morning.  While they lazily sip on their morning hot tea, they are either listening to a family bible study by me or watching an educational video.  School comes some time around 10am or maybe starts at 11am.  Depends on when mom's brain wakes up.  That only comes after a good dose of coffee.  They get done in a few hours, maybe only two if they really concentrate, and then they start their chores.  If they are lazy about it they finish in an hour.  When they are really good at it they are done in only a half hour.  Yeah, young ones have dissected and learned the insides of some animals before most kids ever get to.  It's weird having a five year old depressed because her older brother got to dissect a frog before she could.  Yeah, my kids have it amazingly good.  I don't have to worry about late nights at church and having to rush them to bed because of school in the morning.  We have such a good life. 

Do you think my kids would be at my feet thanking me for the good life they have?  Noooooo.... they think schooling takes too long and chores take to long.  They've completely forgotten their days of public school that they hated, hated, hated.  They hated the long days, hunger, and bullying. They hated getting lost in the system because the teacher had moved on before they were ready.  They hated the hurried lunches and the lame 5 minute recess.  Did you know they've cut recess waaaaaay down?  When I was a kid we had a good 20 minutes-30 minutes of recess.  I needed to get all that energy out.  I'm sure my teacher begged the principal to give me Benadryl each day.  Something to knock me out so she could peacefully teach the rest of the class.  A week ago I told them I wasn't sure about another year of homeschooling because they aren't appreciating it.  They all cried and hung on my leg.  Please noooooo!  I took a deep breath.  I thought about it while doing cardio at the gym, I thought about it while lifting weights.  I thought about it while swimming my midnight laps.  I thought about it while showering, eating, and just before dozing off.  I ran into a book that just made my heart leap for joy....

Click here to see on Amazon

Wow!  This is about 15 different families that are all in different situations and all homeschool differently.  I needed a way to keep the attention of my kids and it seems what I'm doing isn't working.  It's just not as exciting for them.  I've been devouring this book and can hardly put it down.  There are those perfect parents who seem like they have it all together and their three year old is learning calculus and then there are the ones.... like me.... that give so much to the kids that I'm just happy to shower that day.  Do you know why I go to workout at the gym after the kids are asleep?  Because that's when I have the time.  When I go it's usually 9:30pm-12:30am.  No, I don't sleep in all day.  Heck, I'm writing this at 2am because it's the only time I've had yet I still have to get up with the early risers.

I woke up to this the other day. Juliet trying to figure out how to get
out of her crib.  Okay, she's 12 months! Help!

I get excited when I find a book that just lifts my spirits when I'm lagging inside.  I don't have a homeschool co-op or a support group.  I wish I could have those cheer leaders on the sidelines but I don't.  I have to just keep my faith in God, relying on His strength, my mind in constant study, and my heart resting in God's grace.  That is the only way I can give sooooooooooo much of myself every day without cracking.  I'm no supermom.  Ha...  By a long shot.  I'm related to some but I'm not one.  I just have to work super hard.

 

Good news!  I'm down 10lbs!!!  Aaaaaagh!  NO CARBS and lots and lots of juicing and vegetables.  White meat more than red meat.  I'm learning to make really yummy food and I can eat LOTS of it!  I will share soon on a great Souperman food I now make. Get it?  It's a soup but man, oh man, is it packed of good stuff.  Superman himself might be knocking on my door soon for the recipe. 

Living in an Unwanted Fish Bowl- Large Families in Public

Today I got a chance to talk to my dad and that doesn't happen often.  So naturally when he calls I run to the phone as fast as I can.  Otherwise I won't talk to him or another 4 or 5 days or so.  He's a hard worker for sure.  I've never in my life seen anyone work as hard as him with little or no complaint.  Today we were talking about personality types and how there are four different types.  He said there is the social extrovert, the demanding (something like that), the analytical, and something else (can't remember).  I asked what I am and he quickly said the social extrovert.  I'm not sure that's me anymore. 







Alllll growing up I loved being social with anyone, any animal, anything that moved.  Ha ha.  I had no problem talking in front of big crowds of people, singing, acting on a stage, or getting to know any person and was very comfortable making new friends.  Then.... my rose colored glasses began to be lifted.  Kids, if handled with care, wear rose colored glasses.  They don't imagine that walking down the street could bring harm or that terrible things can happen.  Everywhere they go is an adventure and they don't have the worries us parents have. 

Somehow over time my rose colored glasses were lifted and I saw life in a harsher light and so I had to wear my shades.  I saw how vicious girls (women) can be as far as judging each other's bodies, homemaking skills, talents, etc.  Instead of accepting each other for differences and seeing the beauty in it, judgements are made. 



Large family mamas fall into a special category because of being put into a fishbowl.  It doesn't matter where we go we have people staring at us, watching our ability to handle our children, and seeing how the kids interact with each other.  I don't blame them because I would do the same.  I love to watch how mamas do it with so many kids.  It's fascinating.  The hard part is hearing the comments.  You don't know whether you're gonna hear harsh words or kind words.  Over the years I've begun to pull myself into a protective shell.  I'm not sure how healthy it's been.  I don't like being watched and this week was particularly hard because I had extra kids.  I went to IKEA with 10 kids and I felt like I was part of a circus I didn't want to be in.  I like to SEE the circus but not be part of the act.  It's easy to want attention when you never get it because you have a couple of kids but I get it every little place I go.  My old friends from the past have no idea how shy I've become.  They are used to loud Jenny who doesn't mind the spotlight.  However, when you are hurt, whether attacked in person, online, through anonymous hate mail, by family, or what used to be good friends, it's easy to slide into a shell like a turtle for protection.  I hate that I've become this person. 

 

I know people say, "Well, you're the one that has a blog.  That's what put you in a fish bowl."  True.  However, I meant it as a journal escape for myself and also a way to document changes in my life.  I just love to write whether I had no followers or 1,000.  I love followers!  Mostly I have amazing followers.  Whether they are stalker followers.  People that visit secretly but never let me know they came.  Admirers that have this vision I'm the perfect homemaker but don't really know me as a person.  Friends that know me in real life and come to visit every now and then.  Haters that come just to have something to fume about.  Then I have the faithful followers, blogging friends I met online years ago that I've enjoyed hearing from and love to also visit their blog.  ;)  I've helped to put myself in a fish bowl because of blogging and I know that.  However, that's not a bother.  Mostly it's just being out in public... in real life. 

I promise you that I never intend to make myself appear as someone different.  I might withhold things to protect myself and my kids and because some things are just no one's business.  I have been accused of pretending to show a perfect side but believe me, I just blog because I love to blog.  I don't blog for applause, or a show.  I blog about what I love and care about.  I blog about our adventures or misadventures.  I don't blog because I need to air out my dirty laundry nor do I look for sympathy or praise.  You know you are a true blogger when you can't imagine going a day without getting things off your mind and onto your blog. I have a secret blog no ones knows about.  Not even my bestest of friends. :) 

I think it's time I ask God for help in opening up my heart again and not being so afraid to be watched.  After all, about 80% of comments I get are positive when in public.  "The kids are respectful, well behaved, act good in a restaurant, and can sit still."  It's those few weirdos that are just angry I have more than 3 kids and have to give the evil eye or say something.  I can't let the small percentage get to me.  I know I say that but I need to practice it.  Having a tough shell without it being a hard shell if you know what I mean.  After all, I'd rather have smile wrinkles than sad ones. 

 



Like it or not, I am in a fish bowl.  "God, can you just paint it a little rose colored... for me?" 

Today is a Brand New Day

Ohhhh, yesterday was a bad day.  I had a really bad headache from the time I woke up and it only mildly went down before bedtime that night.  It got so bad I had to just go in my room and sleep during the day.  Charles was home so I was able to.  I got up around 5pm only to find out that Charles now had a bad migraine and had to lay down.  His was really bad and he couldn't get up till night time several hours later.  Poor guy.  :(  Needless to say we had to miss church and our sleep schedule got all mixed up.  I dislike days like that because we couldn't homeschool or do chores.  Looking at my work load and not feeling well made me eventually cry. Not like crazy crying, just sit-on-the-bed-and have-one-tear kinda cry.  3 year old Caleb walked up to me and asked really sad, "What's wrong, Mom?  Did Daddy give you a spankin'?"  Oh my goodness, that was so cute I smiled, gave him a big hug, and was back on my feet in a jiffy.  Kids are so cute.

Do you know what it's like to have a large family and not do chores on a DAILY basis?  I bet a lot of you know!  Ha ha.  Lots of kids makes for LOTS of messes.  Since everyone was thrown off their time schedule we were all up at midnight.  Charles actually called for all the kids to do their chores.  I had to chuckle because who makes kids do chores at midnight?  They were happy because they were full of energy and mommy always blasts fun music when it's chore time.  I'm sure if the neighbors heard music blasting, kids laughter, and a mom's voice singing loudly, they would wonder why in the world there is so much racket at midnight.  Oh well!  

Whenever I've had a really, really bad day I always tell myself that this is a day all in of itself.  The bad does not have to bleed into the next.  Every morning I wake up and say, "This is a brand new day!"  It is!  Let the worries from yesterday stay in the past and let tomorrow take care of itself.  Today is a new day.  Today I will once again pray that work comes into my husband's office so Charles can go in.  Today I'm grateful that my kids have not yet grown up and moved out but they are still under my wings.  Today I still have my girls that love to twirl around in their costumes and my boys that still like to play soldiers.  I still have my baby that smiles every time mommy walks into view.  Thank goodness.  Today is a brand new day.

Diaper Rashes & Dinosaur Food

Wow, I have gone through a horrible battle with my baby regarding diaper rashes. I've only talked a little about it but it had gotten so bad that I was getting up every hour of the night to change her diapers. When I was nursing her I never had that issue.  Unfortunately, because I switched her to formula and also changed her brand of diapers at the same time, I didn't know the cause.  I wish I could have kept nursing but it just wasn't possible since I ran out of milk.  I tried eating more, which is why I gained weight.  I tried drinking tons of water and even took Fenugreek pills that lots of moms were telling me about.  Nothing worked and I hesitantly did what I always end up having to do.  I had to switch Juliet to formula.  Well, her bottom started to get really pink and it gradually got worse and worse.  Eventually I had to take her to the doctor and get a prescription.  When that didn't work I tried all the different brands of diapers, including switching to cloth,  then tried different formulas.  I've spent so much money buying one here and there, using it only one time and then having to find another.  Then I tried all the sensitive ones.  By now her bottom was bleeding and she was pooping almost every 15-20 minutes.  After being up with her all night to keep changing her after every poop, I had enough and was calling the doctor again.  That's just not right.  The nurse was perplexed since they originally said it couldn't have a link to the formula.  They called a meeting and then called me back to tell me to switch her to soy.  By now I've spent a lot of money on finding different brands of diapers, cloth diapers, switching formulas without even using most of it.  I had recently discovered a hidden shop inside of a church that is majorly discounted so I paid a visit and found 3 cans of soy formula and spent a total of $8.  That's my kind of deal!  Well, she no longer has a rash.  She's happy and mommy is happy having some sleep at night.  :)

Did I tell you I switched my family over to the Paleo diet?  Basically we are meat and vegetable eaters now.  I do have some compassion about it and haven't forcefully taken away all pastas.  My husband and kids are lovers of it.  However, I have GREATLY reduced it.  Last night I made homemade chicken noodle soup and it had mostly the meat and vegetables in it.  I personally didn't eat any noodles at all but I added a tiny bit for the ones that insist they have to have it.  I asked them for a compromise on it and told them I'd at least like to get them special noodles that are high in protein.  I hope to eventually win them all over.  :D  I feel fantastic and I don't have sugar crashes in the day from so many carbs. I will be making visits to meat markets and to the farmers markets on the weekends.  Should be fun.  ;D  Because of this new way of eating my couponing is definitely being cut in half.  Most of all coupons are about bad foods so I won't be couponing for food anymore, only for toiletries and stuff.

Yeah, I know.  I make everything hard in my life rather than taking the easy route.  Lots of kids, cloth diapers, chickens for fresh eggs, couponing for deals, healthy food planning and homemade meals every day.  It'd be so much easier to just go pick up a pizza.  But... it's a good life.  :)

Finally Getting to be a Band Mom

Caleb and Ivy playing soldiers

Oh, today started out so rough I ended up in tears.  We finally got a large van fixed.  I'm so happy about it.  It cost $1,000 in repairs and although I choked on that (tomorrow another $500), I'm grateful to have it back.  On Sunday we went to go pick it up after church but we forgot that they only took cash at the mechanics shop.  Could we even pull out that much money from an ATM?  I was pretty sure we couldn't.  After pulling out some of it, our account locked up and I couldn't even use my card to buy a bottle of water. After several hours we finally called the fraud department and had the limit lifted temporarily.  Good grief.  I know they do that for a good reason but it stinks when you can't get your own money out when you need it.  

Monday morning I was excited to finally get to drive it again and take the kids to school.  As I back out of my garage I notice something wrong.   A tire was flat!  I had to transfer all the kids and the car seats to our smaller van and try to get them to the school they go to on Mondays.  Now they were gonna be late and missing their favorite class which is the chess class.  Finally we get going and the van is heating up.  Argh!  I didn't want to stop but I didn't want to kill the van.  My husband calls and says work is slow and he's coming home.  At least then we could get a tire and we did after we dropped the kids off.  Before saying goodbye to the kids I promised them that I'd rent their bells kit that they needed for band.  I also told them I would get it before they had band at the end of the day.  Well, that didn't work out because it took so long running errands and getting things fixed.  We finally get all three boys their bells kit just in time for band to let out and go home.  No problem.  I can read music since I played in band for several years in school. You know what hurt though?  How much it costs to rent three separate bell kits.  OUCH!  Oh, for the love of your kids.  In three months the band teacher will start letting them learn on snares and I can return the bell kits.

Since it was a rough day Charles took us out to have fun.  It was much needed but the boys were excited to get home and practice on their instruments.  They immediately set up their bells and we got working on the notes and what they mean.  Quarter notes, half notes, whole notes and rests.  All three understood it quickly and after only one hour they could play a whole page of music in their books and kept time really well. Wow!  That makes a band mom proud.  Charles and I both grew up in band so this is our passion.  I really want the kids to learn an instrument that they can use later in life.  I learned flute and although it was a beautiful instrument, I wasn't able to use it for ministry since bands don't exactly call for flutes very often.  Heh heh....When I was younger and playing flute, I did expand my horizons and eventually learn the alto sax, tenor sax and added piccolo.  It was a lot of fun.

Ivy took this picture of her view from the couch

Finally I am home and although the house looks like a tornado ripped through it, I'm tired and ready to have a meeting with my pillow.  Sigh... :D

P.S.  Diane, thank you so much for following my blog. My dad let me know and I'm so happy you are doing well.  Love you! 

Bad Days with Kids and Cars

Yesterday was just one of those days where you are so grateful the sun eventually went down and a new day could begin.  I can be a schedule nerd and have certain things scheduled for a certain day of the week.  Tuesday is Kroc center day and I went with a friend.  Between both of our kids, they fought at least half the time.  Someone kept coming to one of us to constantly tattle.  I always teach that you never tattle unless someone is being a pervert or someone is in danger.  It was just one of those days where tattling went rampant, and was over the most dumb stuff,  so I felt more like a referee than a mom.  I think this week we are gonna focus on the subject of tattling and nip it in the bud.

After the KROC center we went to IKEA for the kids eat free and to get my favorite meatball plate. I had to keep reminding my kids to sit down, we are not in McDonalds playland.  No running around tables or sitting under your chair.  This is common sense stuff I've taught my kids for a loooong time so I was frustrated.  On a good note I found something fantastic for organization in the boys room.  It was hard to relax because I had left Juliet with Charles before going.  I was fine when I left because I had just nursed her.  By the time I finished eating at IKEA I needed to really nurse her.  BAD. I started to be in a lot of pain and by the time I purchased my items and checked, all I kept thinking about was that I needed to get home.  My husband said she was happy and sleeping but I needed to get home quick.



Finally, we make it to the van, loaded the kids and the purchases, but my van doesn't start.  Argh!!  IKEA was closing and there were not many people left.  My friend thankfully hadn't left so we just had to find someone with cables.  I found a family and we sat there for a half hour trying to get the van to start.  Ashley kept telling me she had to use the restroom but by then everything around us was closed.  NOTHING was open anywhere near... or far. Just before we finally got the van running Ashley starts screaming that she pooped and peed her pants.  Ashley had diarrhea and that's why she couldn't hold it.  My friend cleaned up Ashley (which was soooo nice) while I loaded the kids in the van.  By now I was in TONS of pain and just needed to nurse Juliet.  She was fine at home with a bottle but I wasn't.  It only took 3 minutes to load everyone but once my friend drove off my van died again.  I was supposed to immediately drive off so the van would make it home but I couldn't.  By then the kids and I were really alone and I had to call my husband to come rescue us.  As soon as my husband pulled up with Juliet in the car, I immediately nursed her.  I didn't care what anyone else was doing, I was just so relieved and Juliet was happy to eat.  He drove off in the van so I could just sit and nurse before heading home.  Sigh.  When I went to bed I was so happy there was a new day coming in the morning.  This one I just wanted to forget about.

As frustrating as the day was, I was so happy waking up today to just peace and the comfort of my own home.  :D  After bad days like that it makes me just want to curl up with a good book and sip some hot tea...

Each Day is an Adventure Around These Parts

Neighbor kid hanging out

There are some interesting stuff happening around here but I cannot tell you.  Nothing to do with my family but helping out a friend. Soooo, we've basically had about 4 adults and 12 kids hanging around and spending the night.  Lots and lots of food going into tummies.  :)  

***********

Anyway, today we ate Tortellini Soup and it's the only way my kids will eat spinach.  My sister showed this to me and it's sooo easy and is a family favorite.

-2 family size packages of fresh (cheese only) tortellini.  Usually in the cheese section of store.
-10 or 12 oz package of frozen spinach
-10 cans of chicken broth

Heat chicken broth and spinach (don't really have to drain juices first) to boiling.  Then add tortellini for 9 minutes (reduce heat to medium).  Done!  Then you add salt to taste and parmesan for topping.

********** 

I've been tired a lot. There has just been a lot of things happening from all different angles and I'm just trying to stay strong and figure out how to handle things from day to day.  Last week I was really down so I didn't do much cleaning for a whole week.  I've been really paying the price for it this week. Since there are a lot of people here on and off I figured I needed to stay on top of it.  The last two nights I stayed up till around 2:30am to clean.  It's just so much easier to clean while everyone is sleeping.  Besides, I don't want to just be cleaning and be there for a friend instead.  The good thing is this issue has kept my mind off the last week's issue.  Anyway, I'm super private about these kinds of things in my life so I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense.  LOL.  Caleb is such a light sleeper it's been hard for him to nap but today he just fell asleep in the middle of all the noise and I had to take a picture it was so cute.  I transferred him to my bed for some quiet.

Crappy Days Have Their Purpose Too

Today I am 27 weeks along in the pregnancy and my morning sickness has not let up AT ALL.  Today I have tried every which way to alleviate it.  One problem was that I woke up to fresh made Tamales that a friend brought over.  Usually I wake up slow, get sick first, THEN have my morning coffee.  If I don't do that then the day is a bit more of a struggle and I fight the queasiness a lot more.  I just ate the tamale without getting sick first and so now I'm in a major battle to keep all food and drink down today. Argh!

Today was the hardest day I've ever had homeschooling.  Ivy was not understanding math and neither was Kyle.  We did the assignment over and over and over hoping it would help and no matter which way I explained it they didn't understand.  It's days like this I want to bang my head on the wall and stomp any ants I find on the ground.  Usually we breeze right through each day but this does happen every now and then when we hit a wall.  I was just hoping I wouldn't have two kids hit a wall at the same time. 

7 months pregnant in a few days!  My son
snuck this picture of me.  Passed out with the
phone and iPad.  lol

I've loved being pregnant but I've been really tired.  I will be in the 3rd trimester next week so I guess it's expected.  The 2nd trimester is known for having more energy.  Well, that plane has departed so I just need to get more rest.  My husband is super, duper gracious about this and since he is home in the morning, he will let me sleep as much as I need.  I love that man!  Sigh.

Ashley playing on the iPad with a
diaper on her head and on her foot.

Tonight Chaz and Ivy's friend from out of town is spending the night since they don't get to see them often.  At first I was gonna say no because we have homeschool every day but then I had to remind myself that these are really loved friends that we don't get to see often.  It's times like these that I loved the freedom of homeschool.  I just need to quit being a drill sargeant and slow down a bit.  

Even in really cruddy days like today where I felt like I got nowhere in homeschooling, zilch in cleaning, and bad morning sickness I know that we can't always have fantastic days.  There will be the bad days where I'm reminded how much I need God's strength.  So much I forget and try to rely on my own strength.  My flesh is weak but but He is strong. Humbling days like these remind me that I am only human and everyone has their limits.  It's days like these that I'm stretched just a bit further.  Instead of seeing them as a flat out failure, I remember that we CAN BE stretched.  How will I grow otherwise?  How will I learn patience?  Gosh, how I don't like learning patience sometimes.  It sure comes in handy though when needed.

When a Bad Day Increasingly Gets Worse

I had a really, really, really cruddy morning.  It was NOT okay.  Sigh.



It's Friday again and my kids attend a school for homeschooled kids so we needed to get there by 8:30am.  Well, recently our transmission in our van went out so my dad kindly offered his car.  My husband needs our other vehicle for work.

What I felt like inside

I woke up with plenty of time to get ready but because I had such bad morning sickness I was stuck in the bathroom for half hour.  By the time I got out the kids only had 10 minutes to finish getting ready.  I didn't have time to dress the two little ones because I didn't want to be late and the kids have a field trip today.  I put Caleb in with just his pajamas and Ashley also.  As I'm loading up the car seat for Caleb I realize that the straps are so tight I can't fit Caleb in them.  Since it's a new seat I couldn't find the release button anywhere.  I searched all over and just couldn't find it. By now I knew we were going to be late to school.  I finally put a booster seat in the car for Caleb and I hated doing that because it's more for kids one year older than he is.  All the way to the school Caleb was trying to escape his seat so Kyle had to hold him down. Well, Caleb didn't like that so he was pulling his big brother's hair.  I was on the freeway so there was nowhere to pull over.  

Finally we pull into the school and after I wave goodbye I started to drive off.  One of the kids must've not shut the door all the way because the side door flew open. The lady behind me is hocking like crazy to tell me.  I had already noticed so I immediately flew out of the car to shut and lock the door.  Caleb then realize there is a lot of neat buttons on the door he can unlock and open.  Oh man, how were we gonna get home?  I put my review mirror right where I could see Caleb the whole way home.  As soon as we get driving Caleb escapes out of his seat.  I pull off the freeway and onto a main road to rebuckle Caleb. This time I reposition his seat in the middle and discover this seatbelt locks in place.  Well, as soon as I got driving again he tries to escape so I reach behind me and hold his leg the rest of the way. He's screaming because I'm doing this and Ashley tells me that she's carsick and gonna throw up.  I look down at my nice cup of coffee that is still half full and wonder if I need to give it up so Ashley has something to throw up in.  It's my dad's car and there is no way I want to return it with a throw up smell and a stain.  I give her my cup of coffee just in time because she filled it to the rim.  Then I started to heave so I rolled down my window and drove with my head sticking out.   Ashley's behind me trying to balance the cup so no throw up spills out of it.  As soon as I get to a stop light I opened my door and emptied the cup.

Finally..... FINALLY, I pulled up to my house.  I had made it home.  I felt like crying I was so happy to be home.  Then it dawns on me.... when I left with my dad's keys I had forgotten to grab my own so that means we were locked out of the house.  Sigh.  "Why?  Whyyyyyyyy?!"  Charles usually comes home around that time so I was pleading with God to not let him run lots of errands or anything like that.  Caleb pooped his diaper really bad and in the rush of just getting the kids to school (and thinking we'd be right back) I didn't grab anything.  Ashley starts to dance because she has to pee.  About an hour later of just sitting there I finally just get out and starting thinking about hopping over the fence to at least let the kids play in the backyard.  I didn't want to hurt my pregnant tummy so I began to "build steps" so I could climb over the wall rather than jump.  It had already been an hour and now I needed to potty.  Out of frustration I wiggle the front door and it opens right up?  What?  "AGgggggghhhh!"  First I thought someone broke in but then I remember that the boys had went out the front door to get something and forgot to lock it.  You mean all this time I've been sitting out here I could've just walked in my house?  Oh man, the frustration and joy were all mixed together. As soon as I discover the front door was unlocked my husband comes home.  Sigh.  I walked in and just sat on the couch.  I didn't want to do anything.  Not wash clothes.  Not wash any dishes.  Nothing.  I was just so happy I  made it home.  It was only 10am and I was completely burned out.  I laid the kids down for a nap so I could nap but the phone wouldn't stop ringing.  It rang about every 5 minutes and so the kids only napped for about 15 minutes.  Sigh.

Oh well.  What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.  Next time someone asks me where I get so much patience, I'll share this story or one like it with them.  Yeah, you learn patience through experiences.  That's the only way.  :)  We all have some to share!

I Think Life is Playing a Prank On Me

What an odd last week it was and then how it spilled into the weekend.  There was good and bad mixed in.  When you work for a school district, you don't get paid when the school is on break.  As least not everyone does.  Since we knew a month was coming where there'd be no paychecks we prepared in advance.  We paid double on our bills and even set money aside for things that might come up.  Well, my husband's car died last week so there went our savings to get the expensive part we needed.  Thankfully, his father is a mechanic (a really good one at that) and fixed the car.  Then, as soon as it was fixed, the tread fell off our van tire while I was driving on the freeway.  So we had to park that.  Luckily, he still had his work car to take back and forth. This weekend him and I took turns going to church since we all can't fit in the car.  He rode the car with 4 kids to church in the morning and I took 4 to the night time service.  I grabbed an extra kid from a friend to take home with us and while heading home I got a flat.  I was able to pull into a nice hotel and park it.  We went inside with 5 kiddos and I made them quietly sit in the nice seats while I made a phone call home.  My husband couldn't come get me because we couldn't drive the van so I had to call a friend. She rescued me and took me home but now our dilemma was figuring out how Charles was gonna get to work.  My mom calls about an hour later asking where I was.  A couple was gonna treat me to eat at a Mexican restaurant after I dropped the kids off but I never showed after church.  Darn!  Whyyyyy?  Of all times to get a flat.  I was gonna get out by myself with my mom and some friends.  She came by, had me take her home, and borrow her car so we can take it to get the new tires we need.  Hopefully tomorrow both of our vehicles will be fixed.  Sigh.  By the way, I got a flat in the car directly across the street from where I had to pull over the van last week. 

On to a more fun and encouraging topic.  Remember all that crazy decluttering thing I went through?  Well, I had really been wanting to focus on hospitality and spending more time with friends since having more time.  My work load has been so much lighter so I've been happy to have friends come visit more. At least I've been much more welcoming to it.  I'm just relaxing and wondering what I'm gonna do with myeasy Saturday when a friend called from out of town. She and the kids (Chaz and Ivy's best friends) wanted to come and visit.  Sure!  They dropped in and while our kids caught up, we got to visit for several hours.  I made some steaks and salad and we had dinner together too.  They headed back out of town around midnight or so.   It felt refreshing to feel so much more open to last minute visitors.  :D  Yay for a decluttered house and more time for family and friends!

When Kids are Sick and Optimism is a Necessity

Ivy

Just when we thought we were free and clear from the whole lice nightmare, 3 of my kids came down with bronchitis and had to go on antibiotics. The others ones sick but it didn't get too serious

We were so happy to be back in church and that lasted just one service.  We were back at home again.  The thing about it is the kids are supposed to be practicing for the church Christmas play and they haven't been able to.  So, tonight they'll finally get to practice at church.  Caleb will have to stay on my lap in church though because he's not cleared to go into nursery yet.  Then again, it's extremely hard to hold a baby in church because babies are always in the nursery until 3 years old.  The kids that are sitting in church are well trained to be quiet and stay sitting in their seat.  Often when I bring Caleb I have to get up and just stand in another room so we're not a distraction.  Then I figure since I can't hear anything we should just stay home.  I don't know.  

Ashley and I waiting in Urgent care

The thing about the kids is that they usually come down with sickness one at a time. I first took Ivy to the ER and then Caleb and Ashley another time.  So after I came back from my second trip, literally within a half hour Ashley was crying when she'd go potty.  If only I had known that when we just were at the ER.  So, we had to wait till the next day to go to an urgent care and get her some medicine.  The kids were burning up in fevers, Ivy hacking like crazy, and Ashley screaming about pain.  I feel bad as a mom seeing them that miserable.  They are finally getting better though.  You know what's crazy is ever since I pulled my kids from public school (6 months ago) my kids have been pretty darn healthy. They used to catch what all the other kids had and for the longest time I couldn't figure out why my kids were always coming down with something.  So, to be dealing with this now is no big deal in comparison.  In fact, when my kids were in school they were sick so much that I had to pull out of platform music ministry at church.  I had never connected the dots till seeing how healthy they've been since then.

You know, through all that and having to sit in waiting rooms for each kid, I realized that we had such good times talking and cuddling.  Just being alone with each one.  Often we take kids separately on errands and appointments.  It usually follows with a treat.  Oprah (this is the only time I'll ever quote her) said that moms often feel they don't spend enough alone time with each one.  We forget though that every time we change a diaper, often we're talking and playing with them.  Giving them kisses.  Whether it's to show them how to tie their shoes, potty on the toilet, reading them a book, going on an errand, those all count.  It's so true.


I found this video about how a mother's touch saved her baby's life.  It's so amazing I wanted to share it with you.

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